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Have you heard of a haunting? This dating trend justifies blocking your ex

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We’re aware of the terms “ghost” and “ghostlight,” and now the dating trend “haunting” has emerged within the chat. “Haunting” is a dating trend emerging on social media that describes an ex from a previous relationship who continues to interact on social media even after you have decided to chop off all ties (no contact or seeing one another in person).

Intrusive behaviors include liking your photos, viewing your stories, or leaving comments, which are frequently passive in nature and forestall you from feeling the necessity to respond or directly address the behavior. Basically, being haunted signifies that your ex is watching you via social media, which is the other of ghosting. But what, if anything, should you do about this sort of intrusive behavior?

Some individuals who experience hauntings decide to block their ex on social media, but… Damons Hoffmanrelationship expert and dating coach, suggests that this method could also be a little too extreme. “I believe in blocking only as a last resort. As a dating coach who focuses on communication, I prefer that my clients express themselves through words rather than letting the unsaid speak for them. However, there are situations where blocking is appropriate and necessary. Of course, if someone is threatening you or doing something inappropriate or illegal, you should block them immediately,” he says.

Hoffman continues, “Haunting is an emerging form of communication because we must remember that sometimes not saying something says a lot. When an ex haunts your social media, it can trigger feelings of nostalgia, anxiety, anger and confusion – especially if it’s someone who ended up throwing shade at you without a word or warning.”

However, if you feel uncomfortable because of the haunting, you should take these feelings into consideration and respond accordingly. “Ultimately the decision depends on how you feel about the person being haunted. Does it prevent you from further development? Does it evoke difficult emotions?” says Hoffman. “If the reply to any of these questions is yes, it is strongly recommended that you block them. However, sometimes you can discover and grow by asking the person why they might imitate you and follow you anyway. If the directness of the query turns them off, it could be a good idea to chop them out of your life (and your feed). However, in the event that they respond, you may learn something about yourself, your patterns, your attractions, and the way you might select who you will devote your time and emotional energy to in the longer term.

Relationship and intimacy expert Nikquan Lewis believes that social media is a passive but assertive form of communication and it’s as much as us to develop a “communication code of conduct” about how we wish to be “talked to” verbally or non-verbally. For some people, having their ex-partner see their story is unimportant. But for others, it could actually be frustrating, disturbing, and even very invasive, depending on how they process the tip of things and their relationship to social media.

So if your ex is haunting you, consider this query: “According to Lewis, listed here are some internal questions you should ask yourself to find out your next plan of motion:

Should you block them?

There isn’t any right or mistaken answer here – it comes right down to what’s healthiest for you. Here are some things to contemplate when deciding whether to dam:

Is your behavior stopping you from moving forward?

If seeing their name in your stories appears like a setback or stirs up emotions that make healing difficult, blocking often is the best strategy to give yourself the emotional space you need.

Was the connection unhealthy and even toxic?

If a relationship has caused you harm, blocking is usually the healthiest option. It’s not about being petty – it’s about protecting your peace of mind.

Does this affect your current relationship?

If the haunting is causing uncertainty or drama in your latest relationship, or is just plain disturbing, it might be time to attract the road and protect your peace.

Move forward with intention

Ultimately, the alternative of whether you wish to block or not is entirely as much as you. Prioritizing your mental and emotional well-being is not selfish – it’s obligatory. If a haunting brings something aside from peace to your life, trust that you can draw the road and move on.

Sometimes closing one chapter completely opens you as much as the following one. So if you’re feeling haunted, do not be afraid to reclaim your virtual space.


This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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Health and Wellness

7 things you can do if you think you’re sweating too much

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Sweating is a way for the body to chill down, a bit like an internal air conditioner.

When your body temperature rises (since it’s hot outside or you exercise), sweat glands throughout your skin secrete a watery fluid. When the liquid evaporates, it takes heat with it, protecting us from overheating.

But sweating can vary from individual to individual. Some people could get a bit of dew under their arms, others may feel like they may fill a swimming pool (perhaps not as dramatically, but you get the thought).

So what’s a traditional amount of sweat? And what’s too much?

Why do some people sweat greater than others?

How much you sweat depends upon many aspects aspects including:

The average person sweats at a rate of approx 300 milliliters per hour (at a temperature of 30°C and humidity of roughly 40%). However, because you can’t measure the quantity of your individual sweat (or weigh it), doctors use a unique measure to evaluate the impact of sweating.

They ask if sweating interferes with on a regular basis life. Maybe you stop wearing certain clothes due to sweat stains or you feel embarrassed, so you don’t go to social events or work.

If so, it’s a so-called disease state excessive sweatingwhat affects tens of millions of individuals everywhere in the world.

As you might expect, people affected by this condition most frequently report problematic underarm sweating. However, sweaty hands, feet, scalp and groin might also be an issue.

Excessive sweating could also be a symptom of one other disease, e.g hyperthyroidism, fever or menopause.

But excessive sweating cannot have an obvious cause, and the causes of this so-called primary hyperhidrosis are somewhat mysterious. People have a traditional variety of sweat glands, but scientists consider they simply produce excessive amounts of sweat when exposed to triggers reminiscent of stress, heat, exercise, tobacco, alcohol and spicy spices. There might also be a genetic link.

Okay, I’m sweating loads. What can I do?

1. Antiperspirants

Antiperspirants, especially those with aluminumThey are the primary line of defense and have been designed to scale back sweating. Deodorants only stop unpleasant body odor.

Aluminum chloride, hexahydrate, aluminum chloride or weaker tetrachlorohydrex aluminum and zirconium glycinate they react with sweat gland proteins to form a plug. This plug temporarily blocks the sweat ducts, limiting the quantity of sweat reaching the skin’s surface.

These products may contain as much as 25% aluminum. The higher the proportion, the higher these products work, however the more they irritate the skin.

Make sure you buy antiperspirant, not deodorant.
Okrasiuka/Shutterstock

2. Beat the warmth

This could seem obvious, but staying calm can make an enormous difference. This is because you have less heat to lose, which causes your body to provide less sweat.

Avoid highly regarded and long showers (you’ll have more heat to lose), wear loose clothing fabricated from breathable fabrics reminiscent of cotton (this can help sweat evaporate more easily), and carry a small hand-held fan to assist your sweat evaporate.

When exercising, try it ice bandanas (ice wrapped in a shawl or cloth after which applied to the body) or wet towels. They can be worn across the neck, head or wrists to lower body temperature.

Also try to switch when or where you exercise; If possible, try to seek out cool shade or air-conditioned places.

If your sweating remains to be affecting your life after taking the primary two steps, consult with your doctor. They will help you find the most effective strategy to cope with this problem.

3. Medicines

Some medicines may help regulate sweating. Unfortunately, a few of them can also cause uncomfortable side effects reminiscent of dry mouth, blurred vision, abdominal pain or constipation. So consult with your doctor about what’s best for you.

Your GP might also refer you to a dermatologist – a health care provider like me who makes a speciality of skin conditions – who can recommend a wide range of treatments, including among the following.

4. Botulinum toxin injections

Botulinum toxin injections usually are not used solely for cosmetic reasons. They have many applications in medicine, including: they block the nerves that control the sweat glands. They do this for months.

The dermatologist normally gives injections. But they’re only subsidized by Medical care in Australia under the arms and if you suffer from primary hyperhidrosis that can not be controlled with the strongest antiperspirants. These injections are given as much as thrice a yr. It just isn’t subsidized within the case of other diseases, e.g. hyperthyroidism or other areas, e.g. face or hands.

If you don’t qualify, you can get these shots privately, but it would cost you a whole bunch of dollars for treatment that can last as long as six months.

A healthcare worker giving a man a Botox injection under his arm
In some cases, injections can be found under Medicare.
Satyrenko/Shutterstock

5. Iontophoresis

This involves using a tool that passes a weak electric current through water to the skin decreased sweating in your hands, feet or armpits. Scientists aren’t sure how exactly it really works.

But it’s the one way to manage sweating within the hands and feet, which doesn’t require drugs, surgery or botulinum toxin injections.

This treatment just isn’t subsidized by Medicare and never all dermatologists provide it. However, you can buy your individual device and use it, which is frequently cheaper than using it privately. You can ask your dermatologist if that is the proper option for you.

6. Surgery

There is a procedure where the nerves within the hands are cut, which prevents them from sweating. This is very effective however it may cause sweating somewhere else.

There are also other surgical options that you can talk to your doctor.

7. Microwave therapy

This is newer treatment which stimulates the sweat glands to destroy them in order that they can now not work. This just isn’t quite common yet and is kind of painful. It is out there privately in several centers.

This article was originally published on : theconversation.com
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Health and Wellness

After being laid off, I decided to start Slow Living

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My corporate job made me redundant in February 2024.

When I received that email and lost access to my important source of income, it shook me to my core. And while I missed the soundness of a full-time job, I didn’t miss the late nights, chaotic deadlines, and private exhaustion that had grow to be normal for me. I subscribe to a robust, independent black woman narrative that places ambition above all else. Something should have modified.

Finding resources to maintain self-care is usually a challenge after we lead busy lives. According to the State of Self-Care for Black Women report developed by EXHALE founder and CEO Katara McCarty and published in 2023, 77% of Black women imagine there’s a necessity for more well-being tools and resources tailored to them needs. While being laid off got here as a whole shock, I knew that the routine I was trying to maintain was affecting my mental health. I had to work, but I also needed rest.

“We must start by decolonizing our minds. We have been colonized with the belief that “the harder I work, the more I get.” However, increasingly Black women are realizing that life is more fulfilling while you truly live it on your personal terms. When conditions are gentler, filled with freedom and rest, you might be almost more productive by approaching life from that place,” McCarty shared.

Getting more rest as I considered every part became a priority. So as a substitute of immediately on the lookout for one other 9-5 job, I wanted to prioritize things I couldn’t do before. Even though I thought this transition was nearly me, it wasn’t.

The viral trend of “slow living” has grow to be a well-liked topic in recent times. From the results of the pandemic to people selecting to live more consciously just because those that select to live “slower” prioritize self-care, recent passions, or tapping into their creative sides somewhat than running on the company hamster wheel. Slow living can include quite a lot of things, reminiscent of adding yoga to your morning routine, not answering your phone after 7 p.m., postponing a task in your to-do list until the subsequent day and replacing it with guilt. Slow living is not only about, literally, moving slower; it’s about living more freely and fewer according to the expectations set by others.

“We are a society that likes to be on the move, go, go. And when you get laid off or are thinking about a career change, it’s a season of reflection. The most common misconception about slow living is that something is wrong” – trauma therapist Jaquinta Jackson, ed. LPC told me in conversation. “On social media it looks as if everyone seems to be doing something. So while you’re not moving, you’ll be able to internalize it and think, “I’m not doing enough or I’m lazy.” But the fact is that we must accept that we’re stationary.

As a reformed “busy bee,” staying still was uncomfortable at first. So I can attest that when I compared myself to others, I felt like I wasn’t doing enough. But after some time, I leaned into the silence to reflect and embrace the solitude. In the start, I focused on applying to as many positions as possible. Every day I committed to repeatedly sending out my resume, rewriting my cover letter, and sending multiple emails to my network about potential opportunities. But the energy put into the job search was as exhausting as my previous job. So I decided to use less and create a routine that may help me get used to every day somewhat than “overcome” it. I incorporated journaling, devotional reading, and morning exercises. In the afternoon, I focused more on writing and gaining inspiration, gaining knowledge on topics that might strengthen my skills, and ended the evening with a gathering with friends or family. While every day could also be different, this relaxed routine makes room for other areas of my life.

Fortunately, not having a busy schedule has improved my mental health. Less stress from meetings and work stimulated the will to write full-time and pursue other passions. Taylor Tucker, who went from senior technology consultant to screenwriter, says slow living has helped her gain more confidence in her many talents.

“The biggest lesson I’ve learned from slow living is that I am who I think I am,” Tucker says. “Even though everything is slower, I know that the results of my work and passion will still come. My work has been verified. Previously, I worked in a corporation, and now I write. No one actually told me, “Oh, I like this.” But now I’m starting to hear it. And I thought, wow, I’ve wanted to do this all along. And now I know that with extra time, I do it.”

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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Health and Wellness

Denzel Washington opens up about weight loss, drug and alcohol use

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Denzel Washington is aging gracefully, and it’s no accident. The actor, who’s on a press tour for his latest film, shared more about his recovery journey. Although the 69-year-old Washington is a unprecedented actor, he struggles with common problems resembling weight gain. In a recent interview, the actor admitted that two years ago he was not satisfied along with his appearance and due to this fact made changes.

“I look at photos of me and Pauletta at the Oscars for Macbeth and I just look fat with all that dyed hair,” the legend said within the winter issue of Macbeth. Esquirewhere he’s the quilt star with a head stuffed with gray hair.

He continued: “I said, ‘Those days are over, man.’ To begin his journey to a more optimal weight, Washington accepted help from a friend.

“My good friend, my little brother, Lenny Kravitz, said, ‘D, I want to set you up with a coach.’ And he did, and he is another man of God. I started with him last February,” Washington said.

“He prepares meals for me and we train, and now I weigh 190 pounds and am on my way to 185.”

“I feel like I’m getting stronger,” the Golden Globe winner added. “Strong is important,” he told Esquire. “I’m doing everything I can.”

The labor paid off, because the two-time Oscar-winning actor looks leaner and more limber than ever in his latest film.

In addition to planning training and meals, Washington also talked about his past alcohol consumption throughout the interview. Washington found wine “difficult” and his addiction to it developed progressively over time.

“I used to be never hooked on heroin. I’ve never been hooked on coke. I actually have never change into hooked on hard drugs. I shot the identical way they shot, but I used to be never punished,” he said. “And I never became hooked on alcohol. I had the proper idea for wine tastings and so on – and that is the way it was to start with. And this can be a very subtle thing. I mean, I drank one of the best.

The actor shared that he also has a wine cellar in his house. “I learned to drink the best. So I’ll drink my ’61s and ’82s and everything we drank. I loved wine, and now I was pouring $4,000 bottles because that was all I had left,” Washington said.

The actor added that he would also call Gil Turner Fine Wines & Spirits on Sunset Boulevard and ask for 2 bottles of one of the best “this or that.”

When Washington’s wife of over forty years, Pauletta, asked why the actor kept ordering two bottles, he replied: “Because if I order more, I’ll drink more. “So I limited it to two bottles and drank both during the day.”

The actor made it clear that he would never drink alcohol while working or preparing for work.

“I might clean up and return to work – I could do each. Regardless of the numerous months of shooting, bang, it is time to wrap up. Then boom. Three months of wine and time to get back to work,” she said.

The actor also said within the interview that he didn’t drink while filming the 2012 series, during which he played an alcoholic pilot.

“I’m sure I did it as soon as I finished. “It was getting close to the end of drinking, but I knew a lot about waking up and looking around not knowing what had happened,” he told Esquire.

“I did a lot of damage to my body. We’ll see. I was clean.”

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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