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The way Clay handled the ad on Love Is Blind is typical male behavior

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If you do not recognize the headline, this column will probably be filled with spoilers for the latest season of Netflix’s ‘Reality’ series.Love is blind”, so in the event you have not watched it yet and you intend to, I like to recommend you achieve this first before reading any further.

I put the word reality in quotation marks in the previous sentence because, as someone who makes a speciality of mass communications and media studies, I’m fascinated by the way production teams use creative editing to create a narrative that audiences need to consider – especially when that narrative differs significantly from from what the participants later tell us actually happened.

That said, we finally got to the “altar” episode of Love Is Blind season six, and so far as we all know, only two couples made it.

We already knew that Johnny and Amy would make it and say “I do.” Their love story was syrupy sweet from the start, and despite lingering questions on how they’d handle contraception or the inevitable “oops” in the event that they did not have a baby, I rooted for them because they were exactly the sort of refreshing palate cleanser we would have liked between the toxicity present in literally every other scene of this show on this particular season.

My bingo card did not have Clay and AD making it down the aisle, and I definitely wasn’t rooting for them to achieve this, because while she seemed very sweet and sincere in her intentions, he was incredibly shallow and unserious from the start. starting.

To be certain that we’re all on the same page, the whole premise of “Love Is Blind” and the meaning of the “experiment”, as they call it, it goals to prove whether two people can get to know one another higher and fall in love without relying on “superficial” things equivalent to physical appearance.

If we’re being honest, regardless of how crazy the other person is, physical attraction will at all times play a job in our decisions, so it’s comprehensible that somebody may not have the option to operate inside the confines of this particular reality show. There is absolutely no judgment here as as to whether this is true for any individual, but when it is true for you, why would you voluntarily sign a contract to take part in a program that clearly states a few of the rules of the game, or are you not allowed to achieve this? discuss appearance?

Clay is not the just one guilty of this; we saw many individuals in pod episodes describing themselves to potential partners or hinting at physical characteristics or attractiveness.

Chelsea, in the most blatant way, told Jimmy that “people say” he looks like Megan Fox, and everyone knows that was a giant, bald lie. And before you jump to her defense by saying, “Well, she said it, say it, but she also said she didn’t agree with it,” please understand that if she didn’t mean to plant that seed in his head about her appearance, she would not say it in any respect.

I’ve been told before that I appear to be Oprah (). Someone on the forum said I looked like Roz Ryan. I do not think I appear to be either of those two women, and it is not something that ever comes up in conversations about my appearance with a possible partner.

But let’s bring it back to Clay.

In the pods, Clay immediately told AD that he wasn’t going to propose to her until he discovered what she looked like. He also commented on how after she potentially gave birth to his child, he forced her to return to the gym and exercise to maintain her body in shape.

Here’s what a 31-year-old man told the woman he potentially desires to marry.

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We already knew what was coming for AD, and we didn’t want that for her, but she pushed forward anyway, doing what many ladies before her had done and what many ladies after her would proceed to do, regardless that we had loads of examples of why we shouldn’t to do something where we take a broken man, put him in our Build-A-Man factory and check out to assist him improve and grow.

I do know, my sisters. I used to be there too. Let those of us who’ve never experienced anything like this in our lives forged the first stone.

We watched Clay propose to AD, we watched him happily accept, and from the moment he laid eyes on her, we watched Clay objectify her and choke the life out of her.

She’s energetic, beautiful, loving and supportive of him despite all his stupidities and flaws, and he leans on that and takes every part from her while neglecting to pour himself into her in the same way.

The second verse is the same as the first.

In all of their scenes together, Clay continues to struggle with AD’s feelings, including admitting that he is frightened about him cheating on her because he saw his father cheat on his mother.

It becomes obvious that Clay has a variety of unhealed trauma that he must have worked on before she got here on the show, but as an alternative of doing that, he went on “Love Is Blind” and proposed to a girl after which proceeded to project all of this trauma onto her , because that is what (some) men do.

It’s almost immediately clear that he’s second-guessing his decision, however it’s clear in the final episode.

At a bachelor party organized for him and Johnny, he talks to his friend about AD and every part he mentions is shallow and superficial nonsense.

“We are in a very good situation. The sex was good. The chemistry was good,” he says. “As far as her just coming into my space and just feeling comfortable, it was perfect.

“It’s just like a best friend vibe,” he continues. “We just love each other. He truly sees me for who I am and validates it. She’s willing to fight for it. She is ready to love me, fight for me and maintain this relationship.”

This is where I come into the difference between a compliment and a complement.

Clay thinks he’s complimenting AD, but every part he says about her applies to himself. He likes the way she makes him feel. He likes the way she validates him. He likes the way she does all the emotional work in the relationship and allows him to be an unknowing idiot.

This is further confirmed in the vows he makes to her at the altar. It all depends on how she functions in service to him.

Clay compliments “me” because every part he likes about her makes him joyful.

Clay is not and was not able to be a complement to AD because he didn’t focus on her as a girl, a human being and a person.

This is the difference between complimenting a girl and complementing her. Sometimes your compliments are only about things that make you joyful and satisfy you in some way. This is not about her.

When you’ll be able to empathize with a girl and understand her for who she is, and appreciate her as a human being together with her own set of characteristics which have absolutely nothing to do with you, then you definitely will probably be ready to finish her.

Clay told AD at the altar that he wasn’t able to get married because he still needed to work on himself, and while I can acknowledge that he did her an enormous favor by getting out of a wedding that might likely suck the life out of her, I can even cite the indisputable fact that he wasted her time and energy and completely mistreated her love.

Clay didn’t take the experiment seriously. I do not know what his real motives were for making Love Is Blind, but we knew in the pod that he wasn’t ready for a serious and mature relationship, and he definitely wasn’t ready for AD.

However, he did what many men do and used AD as lilac padand once he was done with it, he jumped into the next thing.

This man had the nerve and unbridled audacity to finally ask her for a hug.

After destroying her in front of his family and friends and saying “no” at the altar, he turned to her again for comfort to ease his guilt and make him feel higher about hurting her feelings and breaking her heart.

Because many men do it too.

The second verse is at all times the same as the first.

I hope AD finds someone who gives her the love and respect she deserves.

I hope Clay grows up, gains emotional intelligence and maturity, and stops using women as a stepping stone on his path to private growth.



This article was originally published on : thegrio.com
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More proof that you’re old: Mary J. Blige’s “My Life” album debuted 30 years ago

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mary j blige, mary j blige my life, 90s music,

I actually remember November 1994. I used to be a sophomore in highschool and was still very clumsy and goofy. I hadn’t yet experienced what anyone would call a growth spurt, as evidenced by the very fact that my younger sister (three years younger) was taller than me. At this point in my life, I assumed I used to be destined to be certain I had a terrific personality that would give me a romantic future. I used to be told about one young student who was in love with me, but being 15 and never big, I didn’t really trust in my ability to pursue a dating life. In 1994, I saw myself because the Steve Urkel with no unreachable neighbor.

In 1994, I had a real love: music. I kept buying cassettes and compact discs; there was at all times music around me. Listening to the newest music from anyone and everybody was my hobby. Mary J. Blige was one in every of those artists that I used to be an enormous fan of. I mean, everyone really was. Her album “What’s the 411?” was released in July 1992, so when school began in August, it was one in every of those albums that everyone was talking about. “True Love” and him one other hip-hop remix the most popular songs were on fire and you can start an impromptu jam session in my middle school dining room by simply saying “true love” out loud.

(*30*)

To say that the anticipation for Mary’s second album was enormous can be the understatement of the yr. I still remember being blown away by the music video for the primary single “Be Happy” on MTV and BET’s “Video Soul”. I remember this mainly because I used to be so frightened about Mary’s life standing on those rocks. Of course she survived the video session, but I used to be very concerned for her safety. I could not imagine life without Mary. I purchased this single and mainly burned a hole in it.

Then got here the monster single “I’m Goin’ Down.” The remake of Rose Royce’s single from the movie “Car Wash” (titled “I’m Going Down”) had all of the black girls in my highschool able to break up with their boyfriends so that they too could sing about it lost love – teenage hormones cause strange problems. Let me just say this for the record: Mary’s version of this song is totally amazing. Her performance on the album is known; you can hear all the experience through her vocals.

(*30*)

If Mary stopped making music at this point, she would already be a legend, I actually consider that. But this whole album is a radiator from start to complete. Even today, once I hearken to “My Life”, my search ends in failure; “My Life” is largely a consolation at this point in my life. From “You Bring Me Joy” to the title track to the ultimate minute of “I Never Wanna Live Without You,” this album is a portal back in time to a version of me that was interested by what life had to supply. I used to be given the vocal type of Mary J. Blige to soundtrack this journey.

It’s also crazy to think about it this manner: “My Life” got here out at a time in my life once I was already driving a automotive. Sure, I used to be 15, but my father also let me drive himself, my siblings, and my friends wherever we would have liked to go because he got bored with running errands. We just agreed that if I got pulled over, he would not know I used to be taking the automotive. Coincidentally, although I used to be in a position to use the automotive at no cost for a solid yr before I could even apply for a driving license, I failed my driving test the primary time I took it on my sixteenth birthday. You’ve never seen a father more lost and upset in his son than my father was that day. We now call my father’s facial expressions “core memory.”

If you’re reading this because you’ve got seen the words of Mary J. Blige and “My Life,” you then, like me, are in a phase of life where you’re continually reminded that you’re not only getting old, but you might actually be old. I will not be old as hell, but I’m too old to be within the club, you realize?

Fortunately, nonetheless, my journey so far in my life includes a number of the best works of musical art in existence, similar to Mary J. Blige’s 1994 album “My Life.” This album – just like the profession of its lead voice, Mary J. Blige – brings me joy.


Panama Jackson theGrio.com

This article was originally published on : thegrio.com
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Daughter of Trump supporter Hulk Hogan distances herself from family years later following racist tirade from her dad who called her then-black boyfriend the N-word

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Hulk Hogan and his daughter Brooke have never had any problems in public.

The former “Hogan Knows Best” singer and reality star remained by her father’s side even after making a career-ruining sex tape that captured her father cheating on her mother, Linda Hogan, and in addition included a racist tirade a few black man Brooke was dating at the time time.

However, it looks like the “Brooke Knows Best” star has had enough and now decides that overall, it is best for her to maintain a ways between her and her family.

There is renewed interest in Hulk Hogan’s relationship along with his daughter Brooke. (Photos: Julio Aguilar/Getty Images; mizzhogan/Instagram)

Her Instagram name is MizzHogan. However, she is currently known on the Internet under the surname Oleksy, the surname of her husband, former NHL player Steven Oleksy, and she or he doesn’t follow anyone from her family on web sites, including her father, mother and brother Nick Hogan. Instagram. But her father follows her brother.

While neither party has publicly revealed any details, there appears to have been something of a rift between Brooke and her family when many individuals noticed she was absent from her father’s wedding to his third wife, Sky Daily, in September 2023.

Immediately after the wedding, she wrote a message to followers on her website: “As many of you realize, I value my privacy, but unfortunately many media are guessing why I didn’t attend my father’s third wedding. Rather than leave it to speculation, I made a decision it could be higher to wrap all of it up here.

Brooke admitted that “the dynamics of the family unit constantly change over the years.”

“That being said, my family has experienced A LOT of change,” she continued. “With all of this happening in the public eye, I had to learn how to best cope with the changes that were coming, which was difficult to say the least.”

“In my own journey towards healing and happiness, I have chosen to create some distance between myself and my family and focus on the people and things that heal my heart and are consistent with my personal beliefs, goals and values,” she concluded, before finally wishing her dad “healthily”.

Hogan is suing Gawker Media LLC for releasing a 2012 sex tape that appears to feature him and the wife of radio host Bubba the Love Sponge. In the same video, Hogan used the N-word in reference to his daughter Brooke’s then-black boyfriend while admitting he was a “racist.”

“I don’t know if Brooke fucked a black man’s son,” Hulk said in a report published by Radar on the Internet in 2012. “I mean, I haven’t got double standards. I mean, I’m a racist to some extent, motherfucking n-rs. But in terms of nice people and shit and whatever.

He allegedly continued, “I mean, I’d moderately she was going to fuck some n***a than if she was going to marry a 6-foot n***a value 100 million dollars! Like a basketball player! I assume we’re all a bit racist. The fucking king of n—r.

Renewed interest in Hulk and Brooke’s relationship he resurfaced because of Wrestling Inc’s report on the father and daughter, which fans reacted to in the comments of the article.

One person said: “For her to really distance herself from him, maybe more was said and not on the video. Why would you be so strong to defend him only to distance yourself later? It seems there’s more to it. What’s even sadder is that if you say something that’s outside of your personal norm, you’re screwed. People will never just give up. As long as people remember it, it’s always there. Hogan said some stupid things about it and people may not have forgotten by the time this article came out, but now they’re reminded of it again.”

The person continued: “I ponder how much dirt the people writing these articles have and the way they might feel if the public was continually reminded of this?

Coming to Brooke’s defense, a second person added: “Looks like Brooke is getting old. She just decided to live her life and check out to achieve success. Easy to say. Well, she would not have develop into famous if it weren’t for her father. Of course, good point. But most individuals are on this position. Especially when he’s younger, he tries various things. How it’s. He seems to generally enjoy being out of the highlight. Good for her.

A 3rd added: “I hope they will heal the rift that exists between them. “I wouldn’t want to be separated from my son or daughter when they become adults.”

During 2015 sit down on “Entertainment Tonight,” Brooke defended the former skilled wrestler, assuring viewers that her father “wasn’t a racist.”

“I do not support what he said. But he’s my dad. I really like him,” she said in the video. “When you’re angry, when you’re at the worst point in your life and you’re angry at someone, you just choose words that don’t fit the situation just to air out your shorts and that’s all. Because I looked at the transcripts and thought, “Yeah, he’s pissed.” But it’s not him. He’s not a racist.”

Brooke continued, “I feel sorry for the dad, but I also feel sorry for the African-American fans and stuff because they do not know that he didn’t mean it. He takes responsibility for it and knows that he thinks, “I fucked up.” These are the consequences of what is going on.

But this wasn’t her father’s first racist tirade or his first utterance of something that shocked the world. Hogan’s biopic was cut short days after he threatened Vice President Kamala Harris in August at an event in Ohio promoting his “Real American Beer” brand.

“Do you want me to hit someone? Do you want me to punch Kamala Harris? I said, “Do you want me to punch Kamala Harris?” Hogan said to the large audience before mentioning one of his signature wrestling moves. “Do you want me to let go of Kamala’s leg?”

The longtime Donald Trump supporter continued to mock her heritage with hand gestures and mispronounced Harris’ name.


This article was originally published on : atlantablackstar.com
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Boyz II Men brings their untold story to the big screen – Essence

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Denise Truscello/Getty Images

Boyz II Men, the Philadelphia-born vocal group that defined an era with wealthy harmonies and timeless ballads like “End of the Road” and “On Bended Knee,” are finally ready to tell their story on their own terms. The 4-time Grammy Award winner is working on a biographical film that can chronicle their thirty-yr profession, a journey stuffed with chart success, brotherhood and the behind-the-scenes struggles that shaped their music.

He announced the project for the first time can be produced in association with Compelling Pictures and Primary Wave and executive produced by Nathan Morris, Shawn Stockman and Wanya Morris of Boyz II Men. Compelling Pictures also releases an in-depth documentary about the group’s unparalleled dominance in the Nineties and 2000s and its continued relevance today.

“We have been waiting to find the right partners who understand our story and are willing to tell the story,” Nathan Morris shared in a press release. “Denis and Jeff at Compelling Pictures understood us from day one.”

Denis O’Sullivan () and Jeff Kalligheri (), who will produce the biopic, are in preliminary talks with screenwriters and directors to speed up the implementation of the project. The film, containing a wealthy catalog of Boyz II Men’s hits, shows the group’s path from their debut album (1991) to their current status as music icons.

“I grew up a huge Boyz II Men fan and have spent the last few years getting to know and become friends with the boys, and it’s a huge honor to help bring their unique and untold story to the big screen,” said O’Sullivan and Kalligheri. “We are thrilled to showcase the brotherhood and camaraderie, as well as the challenges and conflict, the humor and heartbreak, that accompanied the unparalleled success that Nate, Shawn, Wanya and Mike worked so hard to achieve. We think audiences everywhere will want to sing along to a sexy, fun, aspirational and uplifting celebration of friendship and artistic partnership that has stood the test of time.”

The film’s production team consists of heavyweights. O’Sullivan and Kalligheri were joined by Larry Mestel of Primary Wave, Joe Mulvihill of The Mulvi Group and Jeremy M. Rosen of Roxwell Films. Mulvihill, who has managed the group for greater than 20 years, added: “Having been with them for over 22 years, I have seen the ups and downs and all the deep emotional turmoil among people. I think people will be pleasantly surprised when they see something behind the curtain.”

More than thirty years after their debut, they continue to be the best-selling R&B group of all time, with over 60 million albums sold worldwide. The group recently celebrated one other milestone by headlining a sold-out, three-night run at the Hollywood Bowl – a triumphant return to the venue where they once performed as openers early in their profession. Thanks to hits comparable to “It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday” and the record-breaking collaboration with Mariah Carey “One Sweet Day”, the group can be remembered by fans for a very long time.

“Boyz II Men are one of the most influential bands of their generation. They are one of the few who transcend genre and format,” Mestel said.

As the production ramps up, fans can expect a soulful and celebratory take a look at the group’s meteoric rise and the bond that united them. As O’Sullivan and Kalligheri joked, it is a story stuffed with “doom-doom-doom-da-da” moments which are each excruciating and uplifting.

From daytime to sold-out arena nights, Boyz II Men’s journey to the big screen can be an eventful one.

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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