Tabitha Brown is at a degree in her life where listening to her body is non-negotiable.

For example, while exercising along with her daughter recently, the 45-year-old vegan food entrepreneur and influencer reached a degree in her training where she simply had to stop.

Ultimately, Brown, who had been training along with her daughter for about two weeks before the incident, discovered that she had suffered a slipped disc.

“I’m still recovering,” she said.

As many ladies know, that is one in all the realities of entering perimenopause – the customarily prolonged period of aging in a girl’s body before she enters menopause. Although it can begin in a girl’s mid-to-late 30s, it often begins after the age of 40. Symptoms can include hot flashes, changes in sleep patterns, joint pain, hip pain and itching, which Brown describes because the “weirdest” of all.

“It’s the strangest thing. For example, your back is itchy and your legs are itchy. It’s so weird. Oh, that is so weird,” Brown said with amusing.

The co-founder of The Donna’s Recipe would really like more women to talk openly about perimenopause; particularly one symptom that goes largely undiscussed: bladder leakage, or bladder incontinence.

“When I started talking about perimenopause on social media, the engagement came to a head,” Brown noted, adding. “I realized that women suffer in silence and do not talk about the things that are important to them and that they are going through.”

Brown said that bladder incontinence, or bladder leakage, is strictly what it feels like: “Girl, I just peed myself!”

“It happens in different ways,” she continued. “Some women may not even have the ability to hold their bladder for so long as they used to. For some women, it’s simply weaker now, so once you do stuff you’re often used to, like exercising, chances are you’ll experience somewhat leakage.

Some women develop bladder leakage consequently of childbirth. However, Brown noted, many ladies who’ve never given birth develop the condition over time.

“It comes with age,” she said.

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According to Mayo ClinicHalf of girls will experience a bladder leak of their lifetime. It can start when women produce less estrogen, a hormone that helps keep the liner of the bladder and urethra healthy, which may end up in weakening of the bladder muscles.

When Brown began experiencing leaks, she was in her 30s and had just given birth to her youngest child. Initially, a typical bladder condition forced her to avoid exercising in public places.

“I feel like, ‘Oh, I don’t want to exercise around people just in case,’” she explained, adding: “I would only wear black tights, not colored tights. And I love color.”

She continued: “I do not mind it now. I placed on my little Always Discreet and go about my business.

To further the conversation around women’s health, Brown has partnered with Always Discreet, a line of pads and disposable panties designed to detect bladder incontinence, postpartum symptoms and more. Brown thought that since she was not naturally shy, “Let me be part of this conversation.”

Most importantly, the actress and media personality hopes that other people is not going to let perimenopausal symptoms, corresponding to a leaky bladder, rob them of their joy in life. While she could also be known for the phrase “It’s your business,” since she entered this stage and encouraged transparency, she has learned that many other women shrink back from normal activities like she once did.

“I want to push these women back to life,” she said.

However, Brown couldn’t cope along with her increasing perimenopausal symptoms without more significant intervention. He confirms that going vegan and going gluten-free also had an impact.

Now with multiple brands under her name, the food influencer became vegan across the age of 38 and has since been open about the numerous health advantages she has experienced, including a discount in perimenopausal symptoms.

“It was significantly better. It still happens, but it’s not like I do not know when it’s going to occur, like I sort of know when it’s going to occur, unlike after I had my son, I didn’t know when it was going to occur. It just began happening,” the mother of two explained.

She said it’s about understanding “how we listen to our bodies.” Our body reacts to various things. When he tells us something, we’ve got to listen to it.

Black women particularly face disproportionately high rates of intimate partner violence. A 2020 report from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) revealed that greater than 45% of Black women have experienced some form of physical violence, sexual violence, or harassment from intimate partner for all times. For Latinas, the figure is 37.1%, and indigenous women experience an excellent higher rate of violence at 55.5%. Moreover, black women remain in abusive relationships 3 times more likely be murdered by their partner than white women.

Domestic violence is greater than a personal issue; it’s a public health crisis that, for many ladies of color, could spell their disappearance.

In cases of domestic violence, victims are sometimes isolated from their support networks, which may make it easier for them to vanish without causing immediate concern.

Therefore, understanding the connection between domestic violence and the missing individuals crisis is essential to effectively address each issues.

Underreporting and media neglect

The invisibility of black people within the media is not a latest phenomenon, but it is particularly acute in cases of missing individuals.

When a white woman goes missing, her case is more more likely to receive widespread media coverage, a phenomenon generally known as “missing white woman syndrome.” Meanwhile, the disappearances of Black and Brown women are sometimes missed, resulting in discrepancies in how these cases are handled and the quantity of attention they receive.

Take Gabby Petito, for instance – a 23-year-old white woman who was abducted and tragically murdered by her fiancé, Brian Laundrie, in 2021. Her case received wide coverage within the national media. Photos and videos of her face circulated across social media platforms and appeared in 24-hour news cycles, leading thousands and thousands of people across the country to follow updates from law enforcement investigating her disappearance.

When in comparison with Akia Eggleston – a young black woman from Baltimore who disappeared in 2017 – there is a clear and disturbing discrepancy. The 22-year-old was eight months pregnant when she disappeared shortly before her baby shower. Her body and the stays of her unborn child haven’t yet been found. This is a difficulty of incredible importance and seriousness – enough to realize national media attention. However, it didn’t even attract the eye of the local media.

However, BAMFI’s intervention ensured that Eggleston’s case wouldn’t be missed. Through continued work with the Baltimore community, law enforcement and national media, visibility and awareness of Eggleston’s disappearance has increased dramatically. But it still wasn’t enough to bring her home. Eggleston’s case got here to a tragic end in 2023 when her boyfriend, Michael Robertson, was found guilty of murdering her and her unborn son.

Both the Petito and Eggleston cases are only two examples that display the wide disparity in urgency and treatment from the media and law enforcement. It’s an imbalance that has real-world consequences. Black people make up almost 40% of all missing individuals cases within the United States, despite making up only 13% of the population.

Petito’s parents used their platform to spotlight this disparity. They advocated for fair and equitable media coverage of issues affecting marginalized communities, emphasizing that each missing person deserves equal media visibility, regardless of skin color or origin.

When people of color are neglected within the media, resources to search out them grow to be limited as a result.

The need for systemic changes in law enforcement

Law enforcement must take domestic violence seriously, especially when it involves women of color.

2020 study conducted by the corporate National Library of Medicine shows that Black and Latina women who had experienced intimate partner violence or sexual violence were two to 3 times more more likely to experience a dismissive response or mistreatment from law enforcement when reporting harassment.

In many cases, law enforcement has been slower to reply to reports of missing black women and children, labeling them as “runaways” or “engaged in criminal activity.” This contributes to a cycle of neglect and invisibility that puts these women at greater risk of harm.

Authorities should investigate these cases with the identical urgency as they’d anyone else, and training is crucial to strengthen appropriate responses and ensure the protection of all victims.

Adopting mandatory approaches comparable to early intervention and risk assessment might help police discover potential escalations in domestic violence cases before they escalate into potential abductions and murders.

Furthermore, domestic violence calls to the police often only lead to a police report or arrest, but officers should take the time and opportunity to point victims to community resources and support systems.

While nonprofits and domestic violence shelters do essential work, they are sometimes underfunded and overburdened. More funding must be allocated to those organizations to assist them provide the services that victims of violence have to escape abusive relationships and stay secure.

At the middle of each domestic violence and missing individuals crises are survivors – victims of color who’ve been failed by the systems that were alleged to protect them. If we take the problem of missing Black people seriously, we must also take domestic violence seriously. It is not enough to report statistics; we must first address the basis causes and structural inequalities that leave victims vulnerable.

To break the cycle of violence and disappearances, we must center the voices of survivors and spend money on the communities most affected by these issues. In this fashion, we can begin to end domestic violence and the missing individuals crisis and work towards a future during which every man, woman and child, regardless of race or origin, can live free from violence and fear.

Listen, sister – we want to discuss money.

In particular, we want to have an honest conversation about why so a lot of us leave money on the table during salary negotiations. According to the National Women’s Law Center, Black women earn just 63 cents for each dollar earned by non-Hispanic white men. And while systemic racism and gender discrimination play a major role in this disparity, there may be one other factor we must address: our tendency to underestimate ourselves.

The numbers paint a stark picture. The National Center for Education Statistics reports that Black women are amongst essentially the most educated demographic in America, with college enrollment increasing by 34% between 2009 and 2019. Yet despite our academic achievements, the pay gap persists. Additionally, this gap is costing black women roughly $946,120 over a 40-12 months profession.

It’s not nearly external barriers – it is also about internal barriers. Many of us have internalized the pressure to be glad about opportunities, work twice as hard, and avoid appearing “too demanding.” We have been conditioned to attenuate our achievements and query our price.

But the reality is: standing up for your price is not demanding – it’s crucial.

Do your research.

The path to securing our worth begins with understanding our worth. Before you enter into any negotiations, arm yourself with knowledge. Research industry standards for your role and experience level. Find out in regards to the applicable rates. Understand that the primary number you set on the table sets the tone for your entire negotiation.

Don’t just depend on general salary web sites. Leverage your network of skilled Black women, especially those that are several steps ahead of you in your industry. Join industry groups on LinkedIn and skilled organizations where discussions about compensation are encouraged. The real gold is not in the numbers – it’s in understanding the total scope of what is negotiable, from signing bonuses to equity, from skilled development budgets to flexible working arrangements.

Track your victories.

When it involves actual negotiations, preparation is strength. Create what I call a “brag book” – a running document of your achievements, accomplished projects, and positive feedback. Every time you exceed a goal, solve an issue, or receive praise from colleagues or customers, add it to your collection. These aren’t just feel-good moments; they’re proof of your price.

Turn these wins into tangible negotiating points, quantifying your impact when possible. Have you increased your efficiency? By what percentage? Have you acquired recent customers? What was their value? Have you mentored younger team members as they’ve moved up? These numbers and narratives aren’t just proof of your past performance – they’re predictors of your future value and justify every penny you ask for.

Master the strategic pause.

Treat the negotiation itself as a strategic conversation, not a confrontation. Start with a high amount – much higher than the goal number – because employers often expect negotiations and infrequently have room in their budgets. Guide you with data about market rates and your specific achievements. When you receive a proposal, refrain from responding immediately.

Instead, harness the facility of pause. Please take the time to fastidiously review your entire package. Ask detailed questions on bonus structures, review cycles and advancement opportunities. This is not pretending it’s hard to attain – it’s an exercise in due diligence. A well-timed “I need to review the details” conveys professionalism and reminds them that you just are a beneficial asset making an informed business decision. Remember that fastidiously considering their offer demonstrates your value as a thoughtful and strategic decision maker.

Here’s what it’s really about: each time we accept lower than we’re price, we not only change ourselves – we affect the Black women who come after us. Your salary negotiations create benchmarks for future Black women employees. By defending your price, you defend all of us.

The reality is that self-confidence is not just about how you are feeling; it’s about what you do. Start treating your profession like an investment and negotiate accordingly. The next time you are tempted to simply accept the primary offer or hesitate to counter, remember this: you are not negotiating only for yourself. You negotiate on behalf of each black girl who dreams of following in your footsteps.