Entertainment
The Netflix documentary Tell Them You Love Me is a truly bizarre trip to WTFsville
(Spoiler alert: This article comprises ALL spoilers.)
I had no intention of watching “Tell Them You Love Me” a documentary that appeared on Netflix and recently gained attention from my social media community. But I kept seeing people I do know talking about someone named “DMan” and the way annoyed they were that somebody mispronounced it, which must have been virtually unattainable, so I Googled it and, well, here we’re. I watched Tell Them You Love Me and I’m so indignant about so many things on this documentary that when it ended I wanted to fight the air. One of the primary characters within the documentary, Dr. Anna Stubblefield, relates this story to Alice in Wonderland and he or she couldn’t be more right because many of the story is WTF, very similar to Lewis Carroll’s classic.
“Tell Them You Love Me” is about many things without delay: caregiving for the mentally challenged, cerebral palsy, sex, neglect, literature, white people, facilitated communication (and whether or not it’s real), Jesus, consent, deception, white savior, not listening to black women, and the list goes on. At its core, it asks the viewer to grapple with one query: Do you suspect that this white woman, academic, and practitioner (Anna) truly believed that she helped Derrick Johnson (aka DMan)—a mentally challenged, nonverbal black man with cerebral palsy—unblock his communication, intelligence, emotional, and physical desires? Is she a sexual predator because DMan was unable to consent to the sexual relationship she believed he was having, thus making her a liar and rapist who exploited DMan for his own twisted pleasures? He’s actually someone who recurrently breaks the road, but is he a criminal?
Spoiler alert: the court found the latter and sentenced her to 12 years in prison. She was released after two years of appeals, and it doesn’t appear that New Jersey will retry the case.
But let’s leave the ballistics alone. DMan (this nickname means a lot to anyone watching) was born with cerebral palsy, is non-verbal, and was diagnosed with severe mental retardation early in life. His mother and brother Jan maintain him. While John was pursuing his Ph.D. at Rutgers University in Newark, New Jersey, he met Anna, who was doing work that John thought would help his brother. Then there was the element of facilitated communication. Communication made easy is a approach to helping non-verbal people communicate by supporting their hands while writing words on a keyboard or letter board.
Anna met DMan, helped him communicate, helped him express very deep, compelling thoughts and feelings, fell in love with him, risked every part for him (she got married, also to a black man) and went to prison. When DMan’s family had enough (we’re getting to that), they examined him and experts determined that it was all a lie and that Anna was an imposter who was communicating with one another and using DMan for her sexual pleasures.
I got bored watching the documentary at the start. Derrick (via keyboard) told Anna that he wanted to be called DMan, like DEE-man (allegedly confirmed by DMan’s mother, Daisy; the documentary doesn’t show her confirming this), but Anna couldn’t stop calling him Deman ( like Duh-MAN) and it really annoyed me. Every time Deman spoke, I got nervous; CALL THIS MAN BY HIS NAME. DMan was what one other teacher called him when he was younger.
This is one in all the primary the reason why I believe something is fallacious. Apparently one time at school (Anna told DMan to take an African-American studies class at Rutgers) he told her to stop speaking on his behalf. I’m supposed to consider he had the means to correct her for speaking poorly on his behalf on political issues, but let her mispronounce his name perpetually? But at the identical time, if he cannot clearly share his thoughts, how did he even tell her to call him DMan? You will see? This is very confusing.
Anna and DMan supposedly began a romantic relationship because Anna fell in love together with his mind, but I’m confused because… they should have spent an excessive amount of time together. At one point, DMan informed his family (via Anna via keyboard) that he drank red wine (though previously he only liked beer) and was vegan, which might have set off any alarm in my soul. The moment that upset his mother, and the moment where I consider the family was negligent, was when Anna stopped DMan’s mother from playing gospel music within the automotive due to DMan’s classics. This was a bridge too far for his mother, they usually probably became suspicious at this point.
Except they allowed DMan TO CONTINUE working with Anna. Things allegedly turned romantic and sexual. And then the family stepped in, pressed charges, and Anna ended up in prison.
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Look, this documentary is crazy. Or each thing shared within the document from Anna’s perspective is a complete and utter fabricated lie – every part ever typed on the keyboard utilized by DMan was written down; within the document they used “his” typography and e-mails sent between Anna and other people involved in his care – and he or she really is a threat to society (as her ex-husband assures) and a sociopath who took advantage of a disabled man OR DMan’s family didn’t want to accept the proven fact that he was able to every part he supposedly achieved: love, intelligence, expression… humanity.
Ultimately, the family separated Anna from DMan and had him evaluated by experts who determined he was completely incapacitated for nearly EVERYTHING she said happened and every part he wrote. It seemed that Anna was the sociopath they believed her to be, a perpetrator of sexual violence who unlocked his sexual desires, which then became a problem for his mother, who continued to be his guardian through all of it. His mother’s frustration with this seems to me to be the actual explanation for what ultimately led DMan’s mother to file criminal charges. For Daisy, Anna raped a mentally disabled man. The courts agreed.
It’s really sad. It seems very likely that Anna used DMan and manipulated him for years to create a strange version of a success story and went too far. She spent YEARS working with him; patience and the long game really prove the sociopathic approach. What I mean is that Anna and DMan had clear disagreements based on DMan’s archived comments on his keyboard; Was she arguing with herself and never realizing it? Anna also tried to get DMan away from his mother and into her own living space; for 30 years of his life, his mother took care of him across the clock. Somehow he was able to move out on his own? Anna might have real help, and DMan is not what everyone hoped he can be, despite his disability – this should be hard on his family.
The documentary is wild. How you are feeling depends largely on whether you suspect in the thought of facilitated communication, which many leading scientific communities have rejected. And even when that happens on this case, with experts saying DMan is incapable of what Anna claimed, much of this story is bullshit. The family let him stick with Anna for much longer than they need to have, but Anna is truly dangerous.
There is so way more to this document that needs unpacking; even the legal proceedings are disturbing. It’s unattainable to watch this without concern and ultimately feeling sad for everybody involved, including the community of people that consider in and depend on facilitated communication to help their families. It’s just bad throughout.
Ultimately, I hope DMan is okay.
Entertainment
An attempt to save the image of Jeff Bezos’ future wife backfired after weeks of outrage and ridicule over her skimpy outfit
Lauren Sánchez has apparently gained a popularity for her fashion hits and misses as social media users began following her every move.
Billionaire Jeff Bezos’ current fiancée stepped into the highlight long before she met the Amazon co-founder, after years spent as co-host of “Good Day LA,” a reporter for “Extra” and host of “So You Think You Can Dance,” and he even starred in a number of movies like “Ted 2.”
She faced criticism for posting a sultry selfie in November in a negligee-inspired gown by designer Laura Basca. In October, the 54-year-old again faced backlash when she showed off her latex Halloween costume as Catwoman.
Now, weeks after being deemed “cheap” and tasteless, the founder of Black Ops Aviation has turn out to be a subject of discussion.
On December 5, Sánchez and the business mogul attended The New York Times’ DealBook event in New York City. For the occasion, she wore a white Alexander McQueen suit and a white lace corset. The beaming bride-to-be sent two mirror selfies of her outfit, which she signed: “winter white.”
One follower particularly was stunned by the whole look he ejaculated that she was “very attractive and beautiful, gorgeous and stunning, charming and fantastic young lady, sexy, charming, charming and elegant” in the photos that Sánchez took.
Two other people swooned over the photos and wrote: “So chic and elegant!” and “You look great.” But as you would possibly expect from online viewers, not everyone was impressed.
Jeff Bezos’ fiancée, Lauren Sanchez, cropped a photograph of him in a jumpsuit and then set Instagram on fire with her look.https://t.co/n7YNGctQFE pic.twitter.com/DNKP2i9o9C
— Sean Joseph (@sjoseph_sports) December 2, 2024
When Page six published paparazzi photos from the trip, the critic commented: “It’s 30 degrees in New York and she gets out of the limo in a white Miami smock, her bra visible to everyone. No taste. Nothing. A cashmere turtleneck, flannel trousers and a wool jacket can be classy.
Someone else sharply asked: “Who can be the first to tell her that she looks tacky and not elegant and refined? Does she even know what sophistication means? A 3rd person noted: “She looks more like she’s wearing a bathrobe.”
Lauren Sanchez 2003 vs. Lauren Sanchez 2024
Nothing to see here, people, move on#LaurenSanchez pic.twitter.com/mgr4vj6mFq
— Occam was right (@OccamWasRight) November 21, 2024
Another person wrote in a comment from a licensed pilot: “White means…” possibly referring to rumors that Sánchez and Bezos are scheduled to exchange vows over Christmas. At least one person doubted the couple would have the opportunity to say “I do.” This person said: “This will be the longest engagement ever. They will NEVER get married and we all know why!!!!”
Sánchez told the “Today” show hosts that she was in the process of planning the big day last month. She didn’t comment on speculation about exchanging Christmas vows.
Renewed interest and scrutiny of Sánchez has increased as the pair have been spotted in various locations in recent months. The couple reportedly began dating in 2018. Their engagement was announced five years later, in May 2023. Their upcoming wedding can be a second journey for each of them.
Sánchez was previously married to celebrity agent Patric Whitesell, with whom she has two children. She can be the mother of a son, whom she shares with Pro Football Hall of Famer Tony Gonzalez. Bezos was married to the mother of his three children, Mackenzie Scott, for 25 years once they divorced in 2019.
Entertainment
Apart from the song with singer-songwriter India Shawn – Andscape
India Shawn is a contemporary muse with a chilled nature, crafting love stories and heartfelt tales in smooth, charming songs. With over a decade of experience in the music industry as a singer-songwriter, Shawn has incredible strength. She was born in Los Angeles, and her musical roots reach throughout the country. Beginning her profession in her hometown, Shawn eventually found herself in Atlanta, where she immersed herself in the city’s deep-rooted R&B scene, further shaping her artistry.
“I transferred to ATL, I was in 10th grade, and that’s when my music journey really started,” Shawn told Andscape. “I met people who were trying to get by, so I ended up recording and learned what songwriting was really early on.”
Before releasing her debut EP in 2012, Shawn wrote songs and collaborated with artists similar to Chris Brown, El DeBarge, Keri Hilson and Monica. In 2013, she gained much more notoriety when Solange Knowles published her song “I’m Alive” on the Saint Heron compilationmarking her as an artist value watching.
Following the release of the single “There Must Be a God” from the Andscape soundtrack, she caught up with Shawn to learn more about the muse behind the vibes.
Name:
India Shawn
Hometown:
Los Angeles
Artistic soundscape
Airy, soft, telling a story, multidimensional, soft, mysterious, atmospheric
The oldest musical memory
Shawn’s soulful sound is deeply rooted in her upbringing, with influences drawn from her childhood memories and the musical culture of her church. “I sing with my sister all the time, and I also grew up singing behind my mom in church. She was the leader of praise and worship. So I feel like most of us R&B kids have that experience,” Shawn said. “I had these little solos in church, and I believe what made me consider in it was that after the service people got here as much as me with tears of their eyes and said, ‘You really moved me while you sang.’ “These early moments of connection with music and audiences laid the foundation for conveying depth and sensitivity through her music.
Influences
For Shawn, music, especially R&B, has all the time held a special place in her life. “Me and my sister are harmonizing in the living room, just picking some of our favorite songs, including for me Mariah Carey, Babyface, Boyz II Men and (and) Brandy,” she said of her early music memories.
Creative process
Shawn often draws inspiration from real-life experiences and relationships that influence her music. She weaves this into the authenticity and atmosphere of her songs, but she didn’t immediately recognize where her inspiration got here from. “It’s funny that it took me so long to make that connection, but I realized that I was telling my whole story and presenting my business through my music,” she said. “It took me two albums to realize, wait a minute, I’m giving people a lot to understand here… these aren’t just songs. This is truly the life I live.”
Challenges and development
As Shawn’s profession grows, so do his moments of appreciation and reflection. “I literally just thought about a very gradual progression of my career. It’s like step by step, but there are more breakthrough moments. My first tour, which was so beautiful, I just knew I could pack a room and people knew my lyrics and sang my songs to me. Those moments that make the waiting not in vain.”
Shawn has plenty of recommendation for up-and-coming singer-songwriters. Her biggest sacrifice? Collaboration is essential. “I think (cooperation) is really why I’m still here. So find your people… you’ll know when it feels right, you’ll have that freedom and fluidity, and you’ll be able to really create things and create without having to think too much.” He also shares the importance of patience. “Just be patient during the journey. This has been a theme throughout my profession. Let it develop. I feel like more things come from being in that flow and being present reasonably than forcing all of it.
Current project
“There should be a God”, the lead single from Andscape , now streaming on Hulu, also serves as a teaser for Shawn’s solo album. “(This song) is such a manifestation of God’s love,” she said. “I think when you find yourself in a place of waiting, you can feel very hopeless. So when you see glimpses of God’s love again, or the fact that you know there is a higher power, there is a source that is thinking about you, has you in mind, has a perfect plan for you, it’s just like the clouds parting. And this is the moment, I understand. I understand that I had to go through all this to get here. And that’s exactly what I felt in the studio that day.”
Entertainment
ICYMI: Tessa Thompson’s Mocha Lip, Danielle Brooks’ Updo and More – Essence
With just a number of weeks left until the tip of 2024, the celebrities are setting the tone for the brand new 12 months this week. And although mocha mousse is anticipated to be fashionable in 2025, neutral shades in darker tones have gotten more and more popular. Paired with an array of beauty eras – from elegant Twenties updos to 2000s-style round pink, the brand new Hollywood showcases its best 12 months-end beauty moments.
Tessa Thompson and Issa Rae are the newest to debut mocha lips holiday shade near the season, and Coco Jones’ lipstick was cranberry red. Doechii’s perforated suggestions and signature face-lift tape made it probably the most avant-garde look of the week, and within the sweetest moment, Chloe and Halle Bailey’s round pink cheeks made pink cheeks a winter styling staple.
From makeup to hairstyles, Sabrina Elba and Alva Claire opted for light, coffee colours, and Jourdan Dunn’s short hairstyle proved relevant at any time of the 12 months. Meanwhile, Lupita N’yongo, Danielle Brooks and Venus Williams’ braided buns showed just how classic this style may be.
In case you missed it, take a take a look at 17 of the very best celebrity beauty moments from the week below.
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