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Lee Greer has left OWN’s Ready To Love. Her new book helps women stop settling.

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Lee Greer

Almost every woman I do know is uninterested in dating. Not since it is likely to be time-consuming or inconvenient, but mainly due to the inevitable disappointment with the present dating pool. From dating app horror stories to distasteful first dates, men don’t appear to get it: Lee Greer, a Dallas resident, certified personal trainer and former OWN dating show contestant, shares lots of our opinions. When Lee Greer eliminated herself from the show because she didn’t wish to cool down, she had no concept that her brave act would have such a profound impact on women. Her act ultimately sparked a storm of requests from women for her to clarify her decision to take a robust stance in front of a world audience.

“I used to be shocked by what number of women felt inspired and empowered by my decision. After receiving quite a few requests to clarify why I made a decision to eliminate myself and various requests to “write a book, I finally did it,” Greer states.

Her decision to depart such a preferred show reminded women that they will select and not only accept whatever is presented to them. Her book, S, is a guide and journal that helps women see themselves higher and ultimately attract what they need in love and life, becoming the version of themselves that pulls what they need. He drops countless dating gems into the book and offers us ten red flags so we will determine if we’re being lied to.

Check out her red flags to think about below. in addition to our conversation.

Breadcrumbs Red flags:

1. Ambiguous obligation: They always leave you with vague plans or crumbs of commitment, which indicates an absence of real interest in a meaningful relationship.

2. Avoiding the longer term: Avoiding discussions in regards to the future, suggesting an unwillingness to speculate in the connection beyond the current – a possible sign of commitment issues.

3. Inconsistent communication: Inconsistent communication patterns cause you to decipher mixed signals and query the extent of honesty within the connection.

4. Indeterminate relationship: Reluctance to define the connection, treating it as a random affair while keeping you in a state of confusion about your role.

5. Disregarding time: This shows an absence of respect in your time and priorities and suggests that your needs are usually not a priority in the connection.

6. Avoiding the past: Avoiding personal questions or evasive information in regards to the past, reporting potential problems transparently and truthfully.

7. Controlling behavior: Showing controlling behavior or attempting to control situations, indicating a disregard in your autonomy and individuality.

8. Lack of attention: Consistently canceling plans or arriving late for no good reason, reflecting an absence of consideration in your feelings and time.

9. Early Jealousy: Showing jealousy or possessiveness at the start of a relationship, which can signal controlling tendencies.

10. Disrespect for boundaries: A frequent lack of respect for boundaries, whether emotional, physical or personal, signals an absence of respect for one’s comfort and well-being.

ESSENCE: For our readers unfamiliar with this system, are you able to tell us a bit about why you made the decision to participate and why you later decided to depart this system?

Lee Greer: gave the look of an incredible opportunity to show things around. Besides hoping to satisfy someone on the food market, I desired to involve some experts in my dating journey. I used to be looking forward to meeting someone in a non-traditional way. When I began the show, I used to be filled with hope. Over time, I noticed that every one they did was select people from the identical dating pool we were dating.

How are you able to describe the present dating landscape for Black women?

My heart breaks for Black women dating immediately because I see so many amazing single Black women. We face many challenges within the dating scene as social media plays an enormous role in setting unrealistic standards.

Can you talk in regards to the importance of compatibility with a possible partner?

I like using this instance: some persons are a pint and a few persons are a gallon. If you meet someone who’s a pint and also you’re a gallon, you are going to be dissatisfied, even when that person is doing their best and giving it their all. So compatibility could be very, very necessary. Can you grow with this person? The concept of being unequally yoked could be very true. People say that without understanding what it means.

What are your non-negotiables?

Communication could be very high on my list because we will get through difficult seasons and every thing else if we will communicate well. You need to be an incredible communicator. If you’ll be able to’t communicate with me for some reason that you just have not resolved, gone to therapy, understood, I can not take care of it. This is not something I can assist you to with. Lack of leadership skills can also be a non-negotiable issue. I’m very traditional and I’d like to sit down within the passenger seat, fall asleep and know that I’m going to an incredible place. That I will probably be secure. It can also be necessary whether it’s financially stable. For me it is very necessary. I do not understand how people pretend they will ignore it because life costs money. So we’d like to make sure financial stability.

What do you concentrate on casual dates in the summertime? Many of us wish to experience “Summer with Hot Girls!”

Casual dating is great, especially in the event you have not had it. If every thing was so serious, a period of leisure is with a view to meet different people and never know what might come out of it. While I’m a giant proponent of casual dating, you need to keep in mind that it’s casual dating and be mindful of the time you invest.

You use an excellent phrase in your book, emphasizing that you already know when to finish a relationship that now not serves you. Discuss the importance of “graceful exit.”

The longer you hold on to what is not for you, the longer you’ll be able to’t grab what’s for you. Free your hands, it’s okay. Rejecting what isn’t for you is such a decisive move. Freeing yourself from terrible circumstances is powerful. You haven’t got to indicate people what true love is that if it doesn’t serve you. It’s not your job.

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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Health and Wellness

The looming crisis means New Zealand must rethink how it funds aged care

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Latest motions submitted to parliament Health Commission makes one thing clear: New Zealand’s aged care sector is facing a crisis.

This crisis is concentrated on the funding and staffing of aged care homes (ARCs) and residential care and support services.

But the federal government doesn’t should look far to resolve the issue. Australia has modified the best way it funds the sector, calling on wealthier members of society to pay a fairer share of the prices.

New Zealanders in nursing homes

Last yr, an estimated 32,000 people lived in residential aged care. The government’s means-tested residential care grant covers most of the associated fee of care for many who qualify – about 63% of ARC residents.

The ARC subsidy eligibility threshold is total assets of NZ$284,636 or less for a pair aged 65 or over. New Zealand Superannuation, the universal age pension, pays the remaining and provides a modest weekly expenses allowance.

Those with assets above the brink pay for their very own care, increasingly in “care apartments.” These beds, available only to those that can afford the associated fee, reduce what is on the market to subsidized residents, which creates equity issues.

In 2022/23 Health NZ contributed $1.352 billion to ARC providers. Resident fees contributed an extra $1.1 billion.

During the identical period, about 80,000 people over age 65 with social service records or chronic health conditions used home support services (at a value of $2 billion). These services included personal care, cooking, cleansing and respite care. Personal care services weren’t income or asset tested.

New Zealand’s aged care sector is facing a funding and staffing crisis.
Maskot/Getty Images

Elderly care overview

In July 2023, Health NZ launched Funding Review and models of elderly care services.

The aim of the review is to make recommendations that may ensure equitable access and outcomes for older people across New Zealand, while balancing the necessity to implement a cheap system.

The first phase of the review was accomplished in late December 2023. report Five key issues were identified and there have been no surprises:

  • residential care services for older people and residential and social support services are underfunded
  • the financing models used to distribute funds to the sector usually are not suited to the intended purpose
  • there are material ethnic inequalities in access to eldercare services
  • the aged care sector continues to face significant staffing pressures
  • Aged care issues are more serious in regional and rural New Zealand.

Phase two involves developing recommendations for service and financing models that may result in a more integrated model of care, efficient use of resources, and regulatory and financing systems which are fit for purpose.

Despite the federal government claiming $1.4 billion in savings under Health NZ, Seniors Minister Casey Costello says the federal government we don’t intend to chop spending on elderly care.

A recent survey found that 56% of respondents’ ARC establishments made a net loss within the 2022/23 financial yr.

Insufficient funding has caused some nursing home providers to scale back the variety of ARC beds of their facilities. Many smaller providers have closed beds or shuttered their doors for good.

In addition, an acute shortage of registered nurses will see greater than 1,000 beds closed permanently and 1,200 closed temporarily in 2023. It is not any wonder that Health NZ estimates a shortfall of 12,000 residential care beds over eight years.

But underfunding the sector is clearly a false economy. The cost of hospital-level care in ARC facilities is lower than 1 / 4 of the associated fee of a bed day in a public hospital medical ward.

As Aged Care Commissioner Carolyn Cooper says in her statement: last report:

A key problem is the shortage of a selected strategy and planning that takes under consideration the health needs of an ageing population.

Common crisis

The aged care crisis is just not confined to New Zealand.

The Australian government has just accomplished sector overview and adopted 23 recommendations of the Task Force on Care for the Elderly.

One of the more significant changes is the requirement for wealthier people to contribute more to overall costs, relatively than counting on taxpayer subsidies.

The urgency of this modification comes from the undeniable fact that greater than half of all residential aged care facilities in Australia usually are not financially viable. Providers need sufficient revenue to cover the prices of providing services. Every facility that closes reduces the supply of residential aged care for the elderly.

The Australian Government will proceed to cover 100% of the associated fee of clinical care services, while increased means-testing arrangements for each day living costs and non-clinical care will be certain that individuals with assets are in a position to self-fund their care.

Taxpayer funding will be certain that people without assets have access to the care they need.

These changes will improve the financial health of healthcare facilities and in addition improve intergenerational equity by reducing the burden on taxpayers.

An unimaginable burden

New Zealand could learn from Australia. NZ Statistics It is predicted that by 2028 the share of individuals aged 65+ will reach 20% of the population. Within 4 years, there may very well be 30 people aged 65+ for each 100 people aged 15–64.

Older persons are frequent users of health services, and most care and support for older people is currently funded by taxpayers. Without a change within the funding model, working-age residents will face an increasingly heavy burden.

The sector review must be certain that wealthier users of aged care services contribute adequately. Intergenerational equity must be considered in any redesign of aged care provision.

This article was originally published on : theconversation.com
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Health and Wellness

Fantasia Barrino’s Daughter Zion Celebrates 90 Days of Sobriety and Addresses ICU Rumors

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Fantasia Barrino has reached a brand new milestone in her journey to sobriety – she’s now 90 days sober. (*90*) 23-year-old opened up about her commitment to starting a brand new chapter.

“Happy 90 days to me 🙏🏽,” she wrote on her Threads account on September 4. (*90*) update is timely, considering a rumor recently broke that Zion was in critical condition within the ICU. (*90*) 23-year-old also addressed the rumor on her Instagram Stories.

“I’m not in the ICU,” she wrote. In a follow-up story, she added: “And wishing myself dead is really fucked up.”

Barrino’s last update on her journey to sobriety was in August, once we first reported on her decision to get sober.

“Today I celebrate one of the hardest challenges of my life,” Barrino shared with fans on Sunday, August 11.

“I was sick for 3 weeks but I persevered by the grace of God. I met amazing people on this new journey and gained community, love and unbearable support from my family. Happy 60 days today for me [red heart emoji]. If you’re struggling, I’m here to help and tell you about my journey.”

Zion hasn’t revealed what her sobriety has been for, but her transparency can still encourage many who’re struggling as well. Those aware of her mother, Fantasia’s, story has been capable of watch Zion grow over time. When Fantasia rose to fame on American Idol, Zion was by her side and a key part of her story. (*90*) singer gave birth to Zion at age 17, after she dropped out of highschool to live together with her boyfriend.

It’s also a time of transition for Fantasia, who enrolled in college last 12 months after earning her GED in 2009. We wish Zion more milestones of sobriety and strength on his journey.

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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Health and Wellness

Method Man Says He ‘Doesn’t Want to Be Seen as a Sex Symbol’ and Wants to Blend In

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Method Man wants to be known for greater than just his looks. During a recent appearance on the show, he shared the importance of prioritizing respect over his status as a sex symbol.

On the show, Tamron Hall asked him about a quote from his 2023 speech. Men’s health cover. “In the article, you said, ‘I’m not a sex symbol.’ You said that sometimes you don’t want to be desired; you just want to be respected.” Hall also touched on Method Man’s tendency to take his shirt off in public, such as at a recent Usher concert: “How do you reconcile not wanting to be desired with constantly having your shirt unbuttoned?”

He quickly responded, “That’s the thing; now that I have it, I’m going to show it, but not for that reason.” The legendary rapper continued, “I’m showing it while I still have it. But that’s the thing, right? I love the admiration. I love it. Does it ever get awkward? Absolutely. Sometimes you just want to blend in, and I’m that type of person.”

Hall replied, “You can never fit in.” Method Man continued, “Sometimes I do. Again, I can appreciate the admiration. And then there are the only things where he’s like, ‘The Greatest Man Alive.’ I mean, you can pour fuel on the fire all you want, but honestly, I think we’re all beautiful and sexy in our own way, so let’s be sexy together.”

In his cover, the artist shared that he just isn’t a sex symbol. “That’s the fucking point, man. Put the words together. Sex and symbol. What’s the symbol? I ain’t doing nothing. So what’s the symbol?” he said. “I’m not gonna lie, I love every damn minute of it, but I don’t want to be that guy who, when the clock starts ticking, is still trying to be sexy.”

He continued, “I mean, Smokey Robinson will always be sexy to someone. I’m not using him as an example — I’m just saying that considering where Smokey is now, if Smokey was around at the same time as he was then, it would look ridiculous. And Smokey knew he was a sexy motherfucker. You get to a certain age where you just stop caring, and I think that’s the sexiest thing in the world.”

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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