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What I’m Teaching My Black Children During Trump’s Second Presidency

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Election Day ought to be a national holiday. Parents should give you the option to maintain their children near polling stations. This could also be a security issue in swing states where voltage is high. And in blue states, like where my family and I live in New York, it is best to have your kids nearby once you experience a disappointment that turns your stomach, gives you a headache, and makes you wonder if black women ever they’ll do. get what we actually deserve.

Children are profound of their simplicity. The day after election results declared Donald Trump the winner of the 2024 presidential race against Vice President Kamala Harris, I used to be disenchanted but not surprised. I hoped against hope that America would select an overqualified black and Indian woman who had served in all three branches of presidency over a failed businessman turned reality star and former president. I used to be flawed.

When you're trying to teach your kids that morality matters, how do you explain Trump?
WASHINGTON, DC – NOVEMBER 06: Democratic presidential candidate, U.S. Vice President Kamala Harris interrupts her acceptance speech on stage at Howard University on November 6, 2024 in Washington, DC. After a controversial campaign focused on key battleground states, Republican presidential candidate, former US President Donald Trump, was predicted to win a majority of electoral votes, giving him a second term as US president. Republicans also secured control of the Senate for the primary time in 4 years. (Photo: Andrew Harnik/Getty Images)

Donald Trump’s problem – and there are numerous of them – shouldn’t be a lot what he says or does individually, but what he represents collectively. It reminds us how powerful white supremacy is. His ascension to the very best office within the land once more sends the message that you just haven’t got to be nice to guide. You may be sexist, racist and self-centered and still win. This is a lesson that his followers have learned and implement of their on a regular basis lives. This, along with the rights and freedoms he hopes to eliminate, is precisely what’s so devastating about one other Trump presidency.

When you are attempting to show your kids that kindness and caring for others matter, how do you explain Trump?

I’m now a mother of two children. My youngest daughter might be 4 once I leave office. As for her, I worry in regards to the health care she may at some point need and be denied, in addition to the lads she may encounter gassed by his misogyny. However, I’m most nervous about my son. When Trump leaves office, he might be seven years old. While black men overwhelmingly supported Harris on this race, it will be remiss to not acknowledge that Trump’s ideologies appear to be permeating black men somewhat more effectively. And one among my biggest fears is that my son will develop into a part of this problematic minority. I’ve been excited about this for years. Trump’s presidency only jogs my memory that I cannot let go. I must be much more committed to the morals and values ​​I intend to impart and the way I plan to realize them.

Listen, respect and follow black women.

    It’s no coincidence that America felt comfortable with Kamala Harris serving as Joe Biden’s deputy, but modified its mind when a Black woman ran for the highest spot. While there are countless examples of Black women leading families, churches, and full movements, men of all colours consistently wish to put us within the passenger side.

    Since childhood, I purchased my son books that featured Black characters at the middle, women who dreamed, achieved and led. I would like him to get used to this idea. He surrounds himself with many black women in our black family, and I’m already teaching him to respect them, their bodily autonomy, and to be sure that he doesn’t see black women as existing solely to serve him as a boy and eventually a person. As he grows, I plan to show him to Black women in various leadership positions to show him to hearken to Black women not only because we’re the backbone of the community, but in addition because we are sometimes the wisest, most compassionate, and most capable people within the room.

    Don’t be guided by whiteness and individualism.

      The reason Trump is in office is because a whole lot of white people wanted him there. We must be clear about where the blame ought to be placed. Black people, for essentially the most part, did what we needed to do. We tried to vote for the very best interests of all the country. White people voted for white supremacy. In a rustic where whiteness has unchecked power, it is straightforward to be seduced. Many black people have tried to evolve to whiteness within the name of access and upward mobility. But it cost them. It cost them community, connection to themselves, and most frequently it cost them their souls. (In the black and biblical sense.)

      There is strength in community and unity, especially throughout the black diaspora. We are survivors, innovators, and powerful beyond measure. Whiteness could also be winning, but as a black person on this country, it isn’t value chasing that unattainable, soul-crushing status. The price is just too high. I would like to show my son the great thing about all the black community: black men, black women, black queer people, and non-binary people. I would like him to know that working to empower the least of us uplifts all of us. Taking care only of yourself is an empty pursuit.

      Read the book… and not only the headlines.

        The country has a literacy problem. Black and brown students across the country struggle with literacy. The Republican Party is pleased about this fact. This is the rationale they actively try suppress the modicum of accurate history taught in our public schools. They know that knowledge empowers and emboldens the marginalized. They wish to keep us at nighttime. I even have watched recordings and heard quite a few conversations during which Trump supporters being interrogated prove that they don’t actually know not only what he represents, but in addition what he says. People don’t read anything however the headlines. And it isn’t nearly older or unaware voters. College students: our greatest and brightest, they do not read. A brand new term has appeared called LiHos. Refers to individuals who have little information but high opinions.

        I do my best to instill a love of reading in each of my children in order that they’ll turn to books and reading as a source of delight and power.

        Channel your rage.

          They love calling a black woman evil. We have every right to be. We are uninterested in receiving lower than we deserve in virtually every aspect of life. I would like to show my children that as a substitute of demonizing Black women for his or her anger, realize that sometimes it’s justified. This anger was used for our liberation. It could also be sacred. In my home, we practice respiration work and emotion regulation. But there’s power in sitting with our emotions moderately than attempting to cover up the unpleasant ones. If they’re first acknowledged, they’ll result in truth.

          Trump returns to the presidency. We are uninterested in the ways of this world. But the identical thing I hope to show my children, I remind myself: hearken to the Black women who’ve never failed to offer a way of affection, support, and a soft place to go in a difficult world. Remember the community. Our power has never been limited to government.

          As we grieve, mourn and bind up our wounds, allow us to go searching and serve the individuals who might be most affected by these next 4 years… and beyond. Read to remain informed, read to flee, read as resistance. Finally, your anger could also be righteous. Don’t run away from it or try to disregard it with toxic positivity. Use this.

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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Health and Wellness

Are you thinking about dating someone with kids? Read this book first.

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Erica Grace is an creator, lawyer, and parenting dating consultant who believes that a single person (without children) can have a healthy and long-term relationship – dare I say marriage – with a parent.

“I would be bored if I said no,” Grace tells ESSENCE. “I want to fall in love again and I have two children.” The creator is a single mother who can be divorced, but her relationship and experience with dating her parents didn’t start out that way.

The New York native was once single, without children, and dating a person with a daughter. The couple fell in love, got married and had children. Eight years after her wedding, she decided to go away the wedding as a result of infidelity. In the midst of her destruction, Grace decided to show her grief into service. This was the catalyst for her recent book, . The self-help text took six years to jot down, but divorce was the motivation for Grace to place her insights on paper and share them with the world.

“I went into this as a single girl dating her parent. So this situation allowed me to fully understand the different players in a blended family,” the creator tells ESSENCE. “If I will help someone within the situation I’m in – in order that their marriage doesn’t end due to lack of boundaries or lack of preparation – then I feel like I’ve done something about the suffering.”

In , Erica Grace provides a “road map” for navigating what it takes to ascertain a high level of commitment with someone with children, however the creator emphasizes that the book is a tool for stepdads, single parents, and single people dating alike with parents . She explores topics similar to boundary-setting, co-parenting, and step-parenting from her and her interviewees’ perspectives, as their anecdotes are interwoven throughout the text. As single parenthood becomes more common within the United States, with 23% of youngsters living with one parentthere isn’t any doubt about the accuracy of the text, especially for people within the dating pool.

We talked to Grace about what people should know in the event that they’re considering dating someone who has kids (or are even completely against the concept). Here he discusses things to look out for, healthy blended families, the sadness of being separated out of your mother or father, and rather more.

“Boundaries need to be set from the beginning”: Thinking about dating someone with kids? Read this book first.
Courtesy of Erika Grace

The gist: You seemingly start the marriage by discussing your experiences as a young single person dating someone with children – what were your weak points What should others be careful for?

Erica Grace: It’s very easy to get blindsided within the early stages of dating. You are blinded by the sweetness of a baby, you are blinded by love, or perhaps you are even simply lost in infatuation with an individual. That one person you date, love, or desire tells you things that is probably not the entire picture. So if I had more knowledge and knew what to look out for, I might have noticed the flags. To have healthy blended families or healthy parenting relationships, boundaries have to be set from the start. And in order that became the crux of the book.

What are a very powerful things to think about as a single person when establishing a relationship with a parent?

If you are dating a non-custodial parent, you must ask whether the person you are dating has a parenting agreement. How often are they with their child? Do they spend every other weekend with you and never with their child? If so, that is a red flag. Do they contribute financially to the kid’s life? What is the connection between them and the kid’s other biological parent? It will take time to acknowledge the connection between the parent you are dating and your child’s other biological parent, but listen to their communication. If you’re driving with your partner and your child’s other biological parent calls, does your partner answer? How do these people interact; are they friendly? What do text messages seem like between them? You can return 10 years in text messages with my ex-husband. You’ll see every conversation we have ever had, nothing has been deleted. And then you will see the character of our conversations change between April 2023, our divorce, and the current. After this change, there isn’t any indication that I’m related to him.

On the opposite hand, if you’re dating a custodial parent, you need to grasp that your dates will have to be planned – there’s not much room for spontaneity. But ask yourself, what’s their relationship with their child? How do they interact? What are the degrees of respect? Does a mother call her son “my king”? What is their parenting style? How do they discipline their children? Is this completely different from how you would wish to discipline if you had a baby together? Remember that this person’s parenting style probably won’t change.

How should you approach parent and child dating with a couple of person?

Whatever you’re struggling with at once, multiply it by two or three. And in case your partner is messy with one ex but not the opposite, you’re still dealing with a large number. I do not think people must be excluded from the dating pool simply because they’ve a number of exes, but you higher do your due diligence.

In one other chapter you talk about the order of things. You say that in a partnership, God comes first, then the spouse, then the youngsters, after which everyone else. How did this order come about?

When you come from a family unit, there isn’t any doubt who will come first in this situation. In the case of a blended family, the situation is totally different because often the kid existed before the brand new partner. So this could be strange, especially if no boundaries have been set with this child.

So, if you ever allow your child to be within the space where your partner should exist, it would be really uncomfortable when you introduce him to someone recent. So if you’re the variety of woman who calls her son “king,” good luck finding a brand new “king” to bring into this space. Or if you’re a dad who’s connected to your daughter in a way where you confide in her, or if she’s doing the dishes or taking good care of the younger kids, that makes it harder or harder for someone else to come back into that space. You robotically grow to be a nasty stepfather because every little thing changes when a brand new person comes along. The key to this is that you have to be in a really healing space to be certain that you are selecting a superb partner.

But yes, your spouse comes before your kids. You must create this relationship with your spouse, especially when young children are involved. You wish to make certain that you are raising them together as a unit and that each one children, whether or not they were from a previous relationship or out of your relationship, were loved the identical, disciplined the identical and every little thing was equal. And if you do not have this order, your own home might be a large number.

In the book you discuss the difficulty of mourning, more specifically when you break up with parent, then you break up with their child. But as you explained, it goes beyond that. What does mourning seem like when you reunite with your parent and grow to be a part of a blended family?

Oddly enough, the mourning chapter was written before the divorce. It began with me growing up in a family unit and really having to mourn that. I at all times loved my stepdaughter, but I understood that there would at all times be one other adult who would have a say in what was occurring. I also wished she could possibly be at every event. I needed to regret it.

After the divorce, this separation developed. That’s why I feel that as a single person marrying someone with children, you should regret not having a standard family. Then, as a single mom, I needed to mourn the indisputable fact that my children would have to go away home and never be with me at times, which was painful. I wrote a chapter titled “Don’t Throw the Baby Out with the Bathwater” since it focuses on what happens after a wedding ends. What will occur to my relationship with my stepdaughter? I raised her for eight years. It’s unfair to her and unfair to my children and her siblings.

What are your hopes for this book? What type of insights and inspiration can you offer readers, with or without children, who would really like to have a healthy, sustainable and long-lasting relationship?

I hope that married people can use this as a tool to recalibrate. I hope that folks in relationships with individuals who have grow to be stepparents actually read this book – and not only stepparents. They need to grasp their weak points; perhaps they need to give their spouse a voice. Perhaps in some sense they’ve to start out from scratch. I hope this allows people to recalibrate so that they can have a healthier relationship. I also hope that folks in extremely unhealthy relationships may have the strength to go away. There is a chapter within the book titled “Knowing When to Go.” People shouldn’t enter into relationships that cause them pain in any way. Discomfort is okay, pain isn’t.

Single people shouldn’t blindly enter right into a relationship, let alone marriage, with a parent. Ask questions. And for single parents, once you get married the order of things is: God, your spouse and your kids. But when you come together, you come together for yourself and your kids. Choose a partner that is sensible for you and your child.

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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Health and Wellness

A new study suggests that weight loss medications like Ozempic may help with knee pain. Here’s why there might be a link

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The drug semaglutide, commonly known by the brand names Ozempic or Wegovy, was originally developed to help people with type 2 diabetes control their blood sugar levels.

However, scientists have found that it may also help with other health problems. Clinical trials have shown that semaglutide may be effective weight lossand a whole bunch of hundreds of individuals around the globe use it for this purpose.

Evidence has also shown that the drug can help with treatment heart failure AND chronic kidney disease in people with obesity and sort 2 diabetes.

Now a study published within the journal New England Journal of Medicine suggested that semaglutide may improve knee pain in people with obesity and osteoarthritis. So what did this study show, and the way can semaglutide pain and osteoarthritis be linked?

Osteoarthritis and obesity

Osteoarthritis is a common joint disease affecting 2.1 million Australians. Most people with osteoarthritis experience pain and have difficulty performing on a regular basis activities comparable to walking. The knee is there mostly affected joint by osteoarthritis.

Being obese or obese is primary risk factor for osteoarthritis of the knee joint. The relationship between these two conditions is complex. It involves a combination of increased knee load, metabolic aspects comparable to high cholesterol and blood sugar levels and inflammation.

For example, elevated blood sugar levels increase the production of inflammatory molecules within the body, which may damage the cartilage within the knee and result in development of osteoarthritis.

Weight loss is strongly advisable to cut back pain associated with knee osteoarthritis in obese or obese people. International AND Australian guidelines They suggest that losing just 5% of your body weight may be helpful.

However, for many individuals, losing weight through food regimen and exercise alone can be difficult. One study from the UK found that people with obesity were lower than one in ten prone to lose 5% or more of their body weight every year.

Semaglutide has recently entered the market as a potential alternative path to weight loss. It comes from a class of medicine often called GLP-1 receptor agonists and works by increasing the sensation of fullness.

Semaglutide for osteoarthritis?

Justification for the above-mentioned recent research was that although we all know that weight loss improves the symptoms of knee osteoarthritis, the consequences of GLP-1 receptor agonists haven’t yet been studied. So researchers set out to know what effect semaglutide might have on knee osteoarthritis pain, in addition to the effect on body weight.

They randomly assigned 407 people with obesity and moderate osteoarthritis to certainly one of two groups. One group received semaglutide once a week, while the opposite group received a placebo. Both groups were treated for 68 weeks and received advice on food regimen and physical activity. At the top of the treatment phase, researchers measured changes in knee pain, knee function, and body weight.

As expected, people taking semaglutide lost more weight than those within the placebo group. People taking semaglutide lost a mean of about 13% of their body weight, while those taking a placebo lost a mean of about 3%. More than 70% of individuals within the semaglutide group lost at the least 10% of their body weight compared with just over 9% of individuals within the placebo group.

Knee osteoarthritis is essentially the most common variety of osteoarthritis.
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The study found that semaglutide reduced knee pain significantly greater than placebo. Participants who took semaglutide reported an extra 14-point reduction in pain on a scale of 0–100 in comparison with the placebo group.

This is far greater than the reduction in pain for an additional patient recent research amongst people with obesity and knee osteoarthritis. This study examined the consequences of a food regimen and exercise program in comparison with an attention control (through which participants receive details about nutrition and physical activity). The results showed only a 3-point difference between the intervention group and the control group on the identical scale.

The degree of pain relief reported within the semaglutide trial can also be greater than that reported for commonly used painkillers comparable to anti-inflammatory agents, opioids AND antidepressants.

Semaglutide also improved knee function in comparison with placebo. For example, individuals who took semaglutide could walk about 42 meters further in a six-minute walk test than people taking a placebo.

How can semaglutide reduce knee pain?

It just isn’t entirely clear how semaglutide helps treat knee pain brought on by osteoarthritis. One explanation may be that when a person loses weight, there is less stress on the joints, which reduces pain.

However, recent research also suggests that semaglutide and other GLP-1 receptor agonists may have these effects anti-inflammatory properties and may even protect against cartilage wear and tear.

Although the outcomes of this new study are promising, it is just too early to think about semaglutide a “miracle drug” for knee osteoarthritis. And since this study was funded by the pharmaceutical company that produces semaglutide, it should be vital to conduct independent studies in the long run to verify the outcomes or not.

The study also used stringent criteria, excluding certain groups, comparable to people taking opioids for knee pain. One in seven Australians see their GP for knee osteoarthritis they were prescribed opioids. The majority of study participants were white (61%) and feminine (82%). This means the study may not fully reflect the typical person affected by knee osteoarthritis and obesity.

It must also be taken into consideration that semaglutide may cause a variety of unintended effects, including gastrointestinal symptoms and fatigue.

There is a few concern that semaglutide may reduce muscle mass AND bone densitythough we’re still learning more about it.

Moreover, access to it may be difficult.

I actually have osteoarthritis of the knee, what should I do?

Osteoarthritis is a disease brought on by many aspects and it’s important to treat it multi-faceted approach manage it. Weight loss is a very important element for people who find themselves obese or obese, but so are other elements of self-control. This may include physical activity, pacing strategies, and other positive lifestyle changes comparable to improved sleep, healthy eating, and so forth.

This article was originally published on : theconversation.com
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Health and Wellness

ICYMI: Tyla in Roberto Cavalli, Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton and more – Essence

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This weekend was filled with many fashion moments price remembering. First up, Cynthia Erivo wore Robert Coin to the movie premiere in Los Angeles. Additionally, Kelly Rowland rocked the Baby2Baby gala stage at Georges Chakra. For the identical event, Naomi Osaka wore an exquisite Louis Vuitton look. At the MTV EMA gala, Tyla wore an archival Roberto Cavalli outfit.

It is price noting that the Phoebe Philo brand received a separate space in Neiman Marcus in Beverly Hills. Anna Wintour then chosen Marc Jacobs as the primary-ever guest editor at . Finally, Tyla wore an exclusive Roberto Cavalli outfit to the MTV EMA gala, which was much talked about on the Internet.

Continue scrolling below to learn more in regards to the weekend’s fashion moments.

Neiman Marcus opens a special space for Phoebe Philo in Beverly Hills

Phoebe Philo has been on our radar all yr. Her latest? According to , Neiman Marcus’ Beverly Hills retail location has opened a dedicated space for the brand, which debuted on Friday. Located on the second floor of the shop, the space offers select ready-to-wear items, accessories, handbags and shoes.

“Phoebe Philo’s distinct vision and execution is evident in every aspect of the brand,” said Lana Todorovich, chief merchandising officer at Neiman Marcus. “We are pleased to offer our unique platform for her work and make her modern, intuitive and timeless designs available to our clients.”

This expansion follows the opening of a brief location at Bergdorf Goodman in April, in addition to the launch of a everlasting store-in-store in New York City in September.

Tyla is wearing Roberto Cavalli

To attend the MTV EMAs, Tyla wore a dress previously related to icon Aaliyah, who years ago wore this yellow gown to the 2000 MTV VMAs. Notably, rapper Eve wore the identical dress that Tyla wore in 2000. The archival dress was blue with fur detailing and was worn with knee-high black strappy sandals. This look is credited to stylist Ron Hartleben. The exquisite jewels also expressed the artist’s opinion: they consisted of small diamond hoop earrings, a single bracelet and a necklace with a Jacob & Co. watch.

ICYMI: Tyla wears Roberto Cavalli, Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton and more
Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic

Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton

Cyntia Erivo appeared in Los Angeles on the premiere of her latest film titled Erivo and her stylist Jason Bolden committed to a methodical approach to dressing, adding quite a lot of greens, capes and more. For the occasion, Erivo wore a custom green latex dress and fur scarf designed by Nicolas Ghesquière for Louis Vuitton. The dress was matched with a silver choker with an emerald on the within, created by jewelry designer Roberto Coin.

ICYMI: Tyla wears Roberto Cavalli, Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton and more
Steve Granitz/FilmMagic

Kelly Rowland carries Georges’ chakra

Singer Kelly Rowland appeared on the annual Baby2Baby gala in a dress from Georges Chakra’s fall/winter 2024 collection. The star swayed not only on the green carpet, but additionally on stage, where she performed alongside considered one of her most famous duet partners, Nelly. They worked to make the evening as memorable as possible. Rowland opted for a low-cut black dress with gold fabric underneath and a mock neck.

ICYMI: Tyla wears Roberto Cavalli, Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton and more
Tommaso Boddi/FilmMagic

Naomi Osaka in Louis Vuitton

Tennis champion Naomi Osaka was also present on the Baby2Baby gala in Los Angeles. For the scandal, Osaka wore a Louis Vuitton fall/winter 2024 creation. The set she wore consisted of a knitted top designed to be worn with a sleeveless dress with a feathered bottom. The black and white fabric set elegantly fell down the underside of the dress. Osaka was designed by Sue Choi.

ICYMI: Tyla wears Roberto Cavalli, Cynthia Erivo in Louis Vuitton and more
Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic

Marc Jacobs is the primary guest editor in the USA

longtime editor-in-chief Anna Wintour approached designer Marc Jacobs earlier this yr, offering him the chance to take charge of the magazine’s December 2024 issue. This is monumental since it’s the primary time a guest editor has taken over a publication. Jacobs brought something fresh to existing publications, offering his unique style and bending traditional norms in publishing. Jacobs selected Kaia Gerber as its cover star, dressing the model in doll-like outfits and fanciful poses and shapes from considered one of its latest collections.

According to , Wintour and Jacobs worked together on the difficulty.

This article was originally published on : www.essence.com
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