Lifestyle
“I love you, but I hate you.” What to do when you can’t stand your long-term partner
It’s often said that there is a tremendous line between love and hate, but is it okay to sometimes hate your long-term partner? If you ask actress Jamie Lee Curtis, it’s practically vital.
When asked concerning the secret of her 40-year marriage to actor Christopher Guest, she recently replied that the important thing to success is patience, perseverance and “a really big dose of hate.”
“Suddenly you literally want to hate each other. And the next day it’s a nice, sunny day and the dog does something cute or your kid does something cute and you look at each other and go, ‘Oh my gosh,'” Curtis told “Entertainment Tonight” after accepting an Emmy for his role in “The Bear.” “And you’re on a different track.”
Relationship experts say it’s normal for couples to experience moments that feel like real hate. The difference between couples who survive and those that don’t is how they take care of their emotions in these moments.
“Hating the person you love is the most common thing in the world,” said Jane Greer, marriage and family therapist and creator of Am I Lying to Myself? How to overcome denial and see the reality. “We think we should love our partner all the time, unconditionally, but that’s not the case.”
Yes, you should “get rid of the little things”
Stereotypical annoyances like leaving the bathroom seat open or shoes littering the ground add up if left unaddressed, says Terri Orbuch, a sociology professor at Oakland University and creator of “Five Simple Steps to Taking Your Marriage From Good to Great.”
To prevent pet anger from turning into an even bigger problem, it is vital to “worry about the little things,” said Orbuch, whose research has followed a whole bunch of couples over 36 years.
“What starts as a small, irritating habit becomes: ‘You’re not listening to me. You don’t love me. Maybe we’re not compatible and I hate you,” she said.
But criticizing the issue within the moment is not the perfect approach, Orbuch said. Find an excellent time and situation to discuss it: away from the children, not right after work, right before you leave for the day, or when you’re drained in bed.
Be specific
Orbuch beneficial starting the discussion with the positives after which using what she called an XYZ statement. For example, give examples that show that you know that is an overall great partner, resembling being an incredible friend or being good to your mother. Then do the next: When I do X (throw clothes on the ground) in Y situation (as a substitute of the trash can), I feel Z (frustrated).
Then ask, “Can we talk about this?”
Highlighting a specific behavior will help your spouse or partner address the issue higher than if you blame her or him for a personality flaw, resembling, “You’re a terrible slob.”
“We lock the person up where they don’t know what to say or what to change to alleviate the frustration,” Orbuch said.
When you can, highlight loving moments
Greer said an incredible way to quickly dissipate hateful moments is to construct a reservoir of positive emotions. Pay attention not only to the facets of your partner that you adore, but also to why they make you feel good.
For example, if your partner gives you flowers, as a substitute of just thanking him, tell him how you felt when you received them. Saying you appreciate the flowers since it showed they listened to something you needed helps reinforce those positive emotions, she added.
“When you feel love, it’s important to name it,” Greer said. “It’s important to say, ‘You know what, I’m having a moment where I can love you.'”
Featured Stories
Lifestyle
Raven-Symoné announces the death of her father, Christopher Pearman
Raven-Symoné’s father and former manager, Christopher Pearman, has died.
The 38-year-old actress announced her death on Tuesday Instagram post with a childhood photo of the two hugging.
“My life was long and abundant. And the path I’m on began with a dream. I hope he watches with a smile on his face,” she wrote in the caption.
In the comments, the “Raven’s House” star confirmed that Pearlman had died when asked by other social media users. Symoné didn’t provide any further information, including when exactly he can have died or the cause of death.
Along with her mother, Lydia Gaulden, Pearman managed Symoné’s Hollywood profession, which began when she was a baby. At the age of three, she landed on “The Cosby Show” and from then on, her profession continued to blossom. In 2010, the parents were now not managed by Symoné.
While talking to NPR in June 2010, Pearman confirmed that he had stopped managing his daughter’s profession several years earlier, emphasizing that it was time for her “to take over.”
“You know, she got to the point where she said, ‘Daddy, I can run my very own business. A number of years ago I used to be in a position to run my very own business,” he explained. “And I said, ‘You know, you have the tools.’ “
Featured Stories
He also confirmed that there was no bad blood between them over the move. Asked if he was offended by Symoné taking on, Pearman replied: “No, absolutely not. I’ve been managing this little girl’s profession since she was six months old. It’s like having a baby and saying, “You know, I’m ready to go to college, mind my own business, and move out of home.” You know, it’s like, “OK, go ahead.”
Her father’s death also comes almost a 12 months after she lost her younger brother, Blaize Pearman, to colon cancer in November 2023.
In a video uploaded to Instagram around Blaize’s birthday, the ‘That’s So Raven’ star said: ‘He has been battling colon cancer for about two years and is doing higher now. He is loved and missed, and the emotions that wove through my body, mind and family were like a roller coaster.”
She thanked her followers and fans for all their love and support, then added, “I love you, Blaize.”
Lifestyle
Acclaimed artist Richard Mayhew has died at the age of 100
On September 26, 2024, the renowned artist Richard Mayhew died at the age of 100. Known for his hazy depictions of landscapes, Mayhew became known for his “mindscapes” and “moodscapes”, a mode that combined representations of the world and emotions.
“I’m a painter of the landscape of the mind. I’m not a landscape painter… because when I’m going to a canvas I just put paint on it and it’s evocative, very evocative.” – Mayhew he said in 2019explaining the thought process behind his artistry. “Because I’m connected to the feeling of desire, ambition, love, hatred, fear – these are my images. It adopts this type of structure and imagery. I take advantage of landscape as a metaphor to specific emotions.
Born in 1924 in Amityville, Long Island, New York, Mayhew became all for the visual arts at an early age. Under the tutelage of his grandmother, Sarah Steele Mayhew, the young artist often visited the Metropolitan Museum of (*100*), took art classes and discovered connections in his ancestors. Mayhew, who’s of black and Native American heritage, said his heritage inspired him to color landscapes because “when it comes to African Americans and Native Americans, their blood is in the soil of the United States,” he says. ARTnews.
After serving in the Marine Corps during World War II and spending time in Europe, Mayhew returned to New York in 1947. At age 23, he began his semi-formal education, taking classes at Pratt Institute, Columbia University, the Brooklyn Museum School of (*100*), and more, without having to totally enroll in any of these institutions or possibly go abroad to check.
Featured Stories
Although Mayhew achieved his own fame, he gained recognition primarily through his association with Spiral, a mid-century black artist collective. Founded in 1963 at the height of the civil rights movement, the group, which included Romare Bearden, Norman Lewis, Hale Woodruff and Charles Alston, served as an area to debate issues facing black artists and showcase their art.
“It was an advisory panel of all African-American artists,” he added. “It involved debating and questioning the system and challenging each other. …we took up the challenge of the New York community at the time, which did not include African-American artists in various major exhibitions and galleries. Spiral was one of the initiators of that time who challenged the system of arts.”
Mayhew’s work lives on, with the (*100*) Institute of Chicago hosting everlasting exhibitions across the country; Detroit (*100*) Institute, Detroit; Atlanta High (*100*) Museum; Los Angeles County Museum of (*100*); Metropolitan Museum of (*100*), New York; National Gallery of (*100*), Washington, DC; The Smithsonian Museum of American (*100*) in Washington, D.C.; San Francisco Museum of Modern (*100*), San Francisco; Studio Museum in Harlem, New York; and the Whitney Museum of American (*100*) in New York.
Lifestyle
Breast cancer deaths continue to decline as the number of new cases increases among young women
Breast cancer deaths among American women continue to decline. Many advances have made it one of the most certainly types of cancer to survive if detected early enough.
However, the start of Breast Cancer Awareness Month began with an urgent report. According to new report published Tuesday by the American Cancer Society, despite such key changes, the number of new cases among younger women is increasing.
I’m talking to CNNKaren Knudsen, executive director of the American Cancer Society and the American Cancer Society Cancer Action Network, said: “If we have a look at the last decade, we’ve got seen a rise in breast cancer rates of about 1% per yr – an annual increase, and the steepness of that increase has no bearing on this. case to all women equally.
She continued: “There has been a slightly greater increase in the rate of breast cancer diagnosis in women under 50 compared to women over 50. We are watching these issues to try to understand.”
A new report shows that breast cancer deaths have dropped by 44% since the late Eighties. Meanwhile, since 2012, the incidence of breast cancer has increased by 1% yearly. For younger women under 50, the percentage increases by roughly 1.4% every year from 2021.
“It’s not nearly one racial or ethnic group; we see it commonly, so it’s hard to link it solely to ancestral aspects or genes,” said Dr. Sonya Reid, a breast oncologist at Vanderbilt University Medical Center who was not involved in the report NBC News.
Featured Stories
Reid explained that it’s difficult to determine the increase in younger cases. Her theory could also be due to multiple factor, including lifestyle, weight-reduction plan and environmental aspects. What worries her and other experts much more is that it is not uncommon practice for women to start screening of their 40s.
Women who get regular screenings and practice breast self-awareness by commonly becoming acquainted with the appear and feel of their breasts have a much greater probability of early detection and ultimately catching cancerous growths early enough to survive. Depending in your risk level, including whether anyone in your immediate family could have had breast cancer (mother, sister, maternal aunt or grandmother), earlier screening could also be really useful.
As experts and doctors indicate that the number of new cases is increasing and the downward trend in death rates will not be uniform, Black women continue to be the most certainly to die from any form of cancer.
Black women are 5% less likely to develop breast cancer than their white counterparts, but the rates are about the same The risk of dying from this disease is 40% higher. Researchers from the American Cancer Society highlighted how this contrast is obvious even in the most curable types of breast cancer.
Now greater than ever, women, especially Black women, are advised to exercise, find out about their family history and reduce risk aspects. Risk reduction through weight-reduction plan and exercise stays unchanged.
-
Press Release6 months ago
CEO of 360WiSE Launches Mentorship Program in Overtown Miami FL
-
Business and Finance4 months ago
The Importance of Owning Your Distribution Media Platform
-
Press Release6 months ago
U.S.-Africa Chamber of Commerce Appoints Robert Alexander of 360WiseMedia as Board Director
-
Business and Finance6 months ago
360Wise Media and McDonald’s NY Tri-State Owner Operators Celebrate Success of “Faces of Black History” Campaign with Over 2 Million Event Visits
-
Ben Crump6 months ago
The families of George Floyd and Daunte Wright hold an emotional press conference in Minneapolis
-
Theater6 months ago
Applications open for the 2020-2021 Soul Producing National Black Theater residency – Black Theater Matters
-
Ben Crump7 months ago
Henrietta’s family does not plan to sue pharmaceutical companies that claim to profit from her cancer cells
-
Ben Crump6 months ago
Henrietta Lacks’ family members reach an agreement after her cells undergo advanced medical tests